


as if!

by trxnch (thiccjimothy)



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: :), ;), AKA, Angst, BoyxBoy, Cliques, Enemies, Fake Dating, Homosexual, Jishwa, M/M, Popular Kids, Pretend, RIP, Rumors, but i'm here to grant unwanted wishes, djspooks, highschool, i am back and betta than ever, i love bad suns, if you don't like the gay don't read the gay, suffering ™, the fake dating au that no one asked for, they hate each other, this is very gay, twenty one pilots - Freeform, tyjo, woooo, yes maybe i was listening to bad suns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-23
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-05 19:38:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 25,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11584818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thiccjimothy/pseuds/trxnch
Summary: 'it's like i could never get rid of you, huh, joshua dun?"..........aka the fake dating au no one asked for :))





	1. .ew.

**Author's Note:**

> I'M BACK KIDS
> 
> enjoy!

tyler was trying to pay attention to his teacher, writing down notes in his notebook until he felt a wad of crumbled notebook paper hit the side of his head, landing on his lap.

he sighed in annoyance, turning his head in the _only_ direction that it could have come from, sending him a glare. if there was anyone on this earth that tyler hated _the most,_ it was that stupid kid with the bright pink hair and the black and white hoodie on in the back of the classroom. he was the worst person he’s ever met, and there was nothing he hated more than that obnoxious laugh whenever he would get under his skin. tyler kept on trying to pay attention, to make sure his grades stayed higher than _his,_ yet all he was doing was throwing crumbled up notes at him. tyler waited until he was sure his history teacher wasn’t looking in his direction, opening the paper, the crinkles getting drowned out with her voice.

_you’re ugly._

tyler rolled his eyes, looking back at the kid. he smiled, winking at tyler. he turned his head in disgust before ripping out a piece of paper from his notebook, hiding it with his body and pretending to write on it. he used the same note that he was passed and threw it right back at his stupid face, watching as he opened it and frowned at his own handwriting. tyler could not wait to get the hell out of this classroom; he hated history and he hated that kid even more.

within twenty painstaking minutes of trying not to get up in the middle of her lecture and punch him square in the face, tyler left the classroom quickly, really not in the mood for any annoying banter today if he caught up to him.

“tyler, wait up!” his best friend called, jogging up to him. “so...you and josh in there?”

“screw josh.” tyler said, detest lacing his words.

“i know you want to. i saw you two makin’ heart eyes at each other. fuckin’ with your eyeballs and shit.” brendon said, making hand gestures towards his eyes for extra effect.

“brendon, that’s disgusting. i’d probably get ten diseases from that kid.” tyler said, walking into the cafeteria and taking his usual seat in the middle of the table.

“talking about me again?” patrick said from behind them, his snarky tone making tyler roll his eyes with a smile as he sat down in front of him.

“no, just tyler’s boyfriend.” brendon shrugged.

“you have a boyfriend?” patrick asked, shaking his head with a tisk. “i always knew you were gay.”

“you knew i was gay after i told you. remember? when i was supposed to be dating tina roberts.”

“tina roberts? the chick with the zebra print in her hair?” patrick asked, making a face.

“i think zerba print hair is awesome, that’s why i dated her.” tyler said matter-of-factly.

“and by dating, you mean using her as a cover up because you like josh.” brendon butted in, knowing he was getting under tyler’s skin.

“can you shut the heck up? josh will forever be on my list.”

“heck.” brendon mocked, tyler scrunching up his nose at him.

“you have a list?” patrick asked.

“yup. it just says josh, josh, josh, josh.” brendon said, making them laugh.

patrick and brendon were tyler’s best friends, and they knew exactly why he hated the kid so much. during tyler’s freshman year, he wore rainbow suspenders on the first day, as a form of self-expression. which was fine, of course, anyone was all about it. except for josh, who took it as the golden opportunity to not only make enemies with someone for the first time, but to make fun of him for that whole first semester. he would pick on him, fill his locker with unholy concoctions he would create from the expired foods in his kitchen, stick posters around the school he typed up, the whole spiel.

until tyler decided that it would stop, and on the last day of that year tyler pulled the biggest prank on josh, and since then not even brendon could get that image out of his head. it was mostly forgotten about by the school, but tyler would never forget it. in their last three years of school, josh still hadn’t stopped, and just this morning josh decided tyler needed breakfast, and tyler opened his locker just for tons of birdseed to spill out and make a huge mess on the floor. that made him late to class, and he couldn’t exactly tell the teacher what happened either.

_“oh, you know, your asshole of a student put birdseed in my locker. i don’t even know how he got in, but like always, he surprises all of us.”_

like hell.

“yo, are you trying to go out tonight? it’s friday.” brendon said to them both, pulling him out of his thoughts and leaning on tyler’s shoulder.

“i can. where to?”

“i don’t know, probably something at my house,” brendon shrugged, “you in?” he asked patrick.

“can i bring pete?”

“who is pete?” brendon asked.

“a friend.”

_“oh.”_

patrick rolled his eyes, getting out of his seat once the bell rang. “i’ll see you next class.”


	2. .pete.

tyler was getting ready to go to brendon’s house, taking a quick shower before sliding on black skinnies over his boxers.

he looked out the window, about to close his blinds because the sun was too bright when he saw a giant, white truck drive past his house. he walked closer to it, looking out the window to see where it was going.

it turns out he had some new neighbors.

he glaned at the house next to him, feeling like a creep but curious nonetheless. the woman that was helping the movers carry in boxes seemed sweet, and tyler maybe wondered if she had a cute son his age. he discreetly tried to spot him, assuming that if she did, he’d be helping her move their things in.

would you look at that, she did.

tyler gasped in disbelief, his breath fogging up the window when he saw _him,_ his pink hair blowing with the wind when he walked towards the moving truck.. his heart dropped, his expression possessed by disappointment.

“it’s like i could never, ever get rid of you, huh, joshua dun?” he asked himself, grabbing his phone off of his bedside table and going back to the window.

tyler hadn’t even known that the house next door had been moved out of, but then again he should have paid more attention when the family there stopped coming out of the house everyday. he squinted in the sunlight, but he could see that the movers were carrying big, brown boxes into the house, the lady in which tyler assumed was josh’s mom talking to the movers as she helped them. tyler dialed brendon’s number, pressing the phone to his ear as he waited for him to pick up.

“hey!” brendon said cheerfully.

“brendon, there’s a problem.” tyler said, watching through the window.

“what?” brendon’s tone quickly shifted into seriousness.

“you know how that house next to me was for sale?” tyler asked, slipping his band tee on as best as he could while smushing the phone between his face and his shoulder.

“yeah?”

“josh freaking dun is moving into it.”

tyler held his breath, waiting for a reaction. brendon was silent on the other line,  probably just in as much shock as he was. instead, tyler rolled his eyes when he heard brendon’s loud laugh ring through the phone. he could literally see him throw his head back and everything.

“you’re kidding me, right?” he asked in between laughs.

“no!” tyler said. “this is serious!”

“oh, man. this is hilarious. hey, patrick! patrick, get your ass over here, this is some funny shit!” brendon called, his voice sounding far away from the phone.

he could barely hear patrick asked what he wanted, before brendon told him what was happening, and then patrick started laughing, too.

“come, then we could plot how to sabotage josh next door.” brendon joked.

with that, he hung up, tyler sighing. he gnawed on the bottom of his lip, briefly glancing out of his window again before shutting the blinds and leaving his bedroom.

“mom, i’m going to brendon’s.” tyler said, peeking his head in the kitchen.

“are you and brendon boyfriends yet?” she asked, looking at tyler from her cookbook.

when tyler started choking on nothing, his mother laughed at him. “i’m kidding. but do you have a boyfriend, yet?”

“mom.”  tyler deadpanned, making her roll her eyes.

“okay, okay,” she put her hands up in defense, “have fun. i’m going to see if i could make friends with our new neighbors.” she said, flipping through her cookbook. “do you think they would like lemon merengue?”

“what? no! don’t  make friends with them.” tyler said quickly, but that was when he realized that his mom was oblivious to his hatred for josh.

“why?” she asked, facing him and leaning on the stove.

“be-because, uh...” he tried to think of a lie, “because i want to make friends with them first! you can’t beat me!”

tyler’s mom rolled her eyes, turning back to the stove. “go to your friend’s house.” she shooed.

tyler looked to the floor, trying to think of something else to say, but he knew his mom wouldn’t listen to him. he left the kitchen, grabbing his keys off of the table and going outside. he glanced over at josh’s new house, his skin crawling every time he thought about it. he kept his head down, as if he’d disappear if josh were to notice him, getting into his car quickly and trying to get to brendon’s even faster.

..........

“so...josh?” brendon asked, handing tyler a caprisun.

“see, now why do we need to talk about josh every time i’m around?” tyler asked, sinking into a bean bag in brendon’s music room.

“because what you guys have is beautiful.” brendon said dramatically. “a forbidden love between two, destined to be sepe-”

 _“why_ am i friends with you?” tyler interrupted, brendon shooting him a look before hearing the doorbell ring.

patrick quickly got up before brendon could, leaving the music room. “i got it!”

“must be peter.” brendon said, sipping his juice.

patrick returned, a shy boy with platinum blonde hair next to him. pete had an almost permanent little smile on his lips, looking around the room at the many instruments brendon had on his walls and floor.

“this is pete. pete, that’s brendon and tyler.” patrick introduced, pete waving at the both of them.

tyler returned it with a smile before shoving the caprisun straw in his mouth.

“ty, tell us about your situation. it seems pretty fuckin’ awful.” brendon said, looking at tyler.

“it is, honestly. josh dun, the one kid i hate the most on this earth, not only goes to our school, but lives next to me now. what next? our moms are gonna be friends?” tyler asked, but then he sighed when he realized that last bit might actually come true, his mom making them lemon pie and everything.

“isn’t she? kelly’s really friendly.” brendon said, thinking back to when she invited his whole family for dinner the third day tyler and him had been friends.

“yeah. she’s making them _pie.”_ tyler said, like the idea was the most repulsive thing on the planet.

“wait, josh dun? kid with the pink hair?” pete asked, tilting his head.

“yeah, that.”

“that’s my best friend!” pete said excitedly, making tyler’s eyes widen.

“oh, uh, yeah. me and josh we’re, uh...” tyler tried to think. “you know.”

brendon could help but laugh, tyler feeling awkward now that he was talking shit about pete’s best friend.

wow, he loved it.

“why do you hate him so much?” pete asked.

“he’s just so annoying! ever since freshman year he just cannot leave me alone. he put _birdseed_ in my locker today.”

pete chuckled, shaking his head. “that’s pretty funny.”

“it is not!” tyler whined, pouting.

he remembered the birdseed spilling out like a waterfall, and the look patrick gave him when he walked by, and soon he found himself smiling at it.

okay, it may have been a little funny.

maybe.


	3. .date.

tyler was in his room, busy watching the office with his headphones on.

between laughing at steve carrell being extra and crunching chips, he was pretty sure he heard his mom call his name, taking off one of the muffs and listening closely.

“tyler!” she called from downstairs.

tyler sighed, getting up from his bed and peeking his head out of his room, looking towards the stairs. his mom was by the door, a strange woman on the outside of it.

“yes?” he asked, jogging down the stairs.

that lady looked _too_ familiar. tyler didn’t like it.

“this is laura. she has a son the same age as you. and we both think you should get to know each other.” his mom said over-excitedly, tyler making a face.

he never liked talking to new people.

“he always had trouble making new friends, but you seem like a nice young man from what your mother has told me.” laura smiled, tyler lightening up a little bit at the gesture.

“why, if you don’t mind me asking?” tyler’s mom asked.

“he is openly gay, and a lot of boys don’t like that.” the lady shrugged.

“really? tyler is gay, too!”

“mom!” tyler was now embarrassed, face heating up as a deep blush saturated his cheeks.

_what the hell?_

“oh, this is wonderful!” laura clapped, “it’d be great for him to have someone he can relate to.”

“hey, they should go on a date. tyler’s been looking for a boyfriend recently.”

“i have n-” tyler was cut short by the lady at the door.

“so has my son! he’s always complaining about being single, it’d be nice to get him out of the house for a few hours.”

tyler was ultimately confused. he was being set up on a date with a boy he didn’t even know, and now, because of his mother, he seemed desperate for a boyfriend. he _wasn’t,_ he just wanted his mom to stop telling this poor lady lies.

“okay, laura. i’ll call you later, okay?”

laura nodded, waving to tyler before turning around and leaving. his mom closed the door, shooting him an excited look.

“mom, you can’t just go around telling people that.” tyler’s cheeks had lessened to a pink dust.

“what?” she asked, her hands on her hips.

“i’m not looking for a boyfriend!” he said, exasperated.

“even if you weren’t, you don’t need to anymore. you’re welcome.” his mom said.

tyler groaned, trudging up the stairs. “the worst!”

..........

tyler was forced to get ready in nice clothes, his mom coming into his room to make sure he looked nice for tonight. their moms had already set up the date, yet tyler had no idea who the heck he was supposed to hang out with.

he hesitantly went down the stairs, meeting his mom by the door. he definitely was not looking forward to the date; what if the guy was an ass? what if he didn’t like tyler’s cologne? sure, it gave him something to do, but still.

“you look great, sweetie.” his mom reassured him, knowing that exact look on his face when he left the house.

tyler smiled sheepishly before his mom grabbed her keys from the little rack by the door, gesturing for him to come.

“you have your money and phone, correct?” she asked on the way to where they were supposed to meet.

tyler nodded, looking out the window. it was beginning to get dark, the sun casting orange and purple streaks across the sky, the clouds turning transparent against the sunset. black shadows of birds flew in groups made their way back home, trees rushing past the window.

“where are we going?” tyler asked.

“the pier. they have a lot of things to do there.”

“and you and laura are staying with us?” he asked, hoping she would just so he could have some sort of protection if the date went to shit.

“yes, but we won’t be with you guys. we’re probably going to go to the district right next to it.”

the pier was set up weirdly, where there was one district that was actually the pier with the ferris wheel and everything, another district where the adults usually go, with nightclubs and restaurants, and then one where they had an arcade and a cinema. tyler didn’t really know what those types of things were called, but it kept people busy.

they’d finally got there, tyler’s nerves beginning to set in and he could feel his palms get clammy.

“ty, you’re fine. he’s gonna be sweet, laura told me all about him.”

“wait, what’s his name?” tyler asked, probably should’ve established this earlier.

“josh, i think.”

“josh?!” tyler shouted, causing his mom to swerve a bit from the scare.

“what? what?” she shouted back, trying to slow her heartbeat.

“josh dun?” tyler said, internally flipping his shit. “i th-think i’m sick, i-i can’t go on the date.” tyler said, panicking.

he was NOT about to go on a date with frikin’ josh dun, it wasn’t happening. he’d rather eat rotten cheese and wash it down with spoiled milk than go on a date with josh dun.

“oh, please. you’re just a little nervous, is all. look we’re here already.” she said, quickly finding a parking spot.

tyler leaned his head against the headrest, sighing deeply. he got out of the car, going towards the center of the pier with his mom to wait for laura. he glanced around at the pier, carnival music and buttery popcorn filtering through his senses. this made him think of when he was a child, when his mom used to tire him out here and sing him to sleep at night and he had no worries except for not having enough time to ride everything on the pier.

now, he’s just stressed, and this wasn’t helping him any.

“there she is now!” his mom announced, seeing laura walk up to the them.

tyler gasped slightly as he couldn’t not notice that bright pink hair behind laura, and his heart sank to the pit of his stomach. the silver nose ring was enough to make tyler want to run, but he couldn’t. josh noticed tyler shortly after, his eyes widening in surprise, but then they both remembered their parents didn’t know about them, and they quickly averted their eyes somewhere else.

“you two know each other?” laura asked, instantly noticing the tension between them.

“y-yup! old buddies from middle school.” josh spoke, the fakest smile tyler had ever seen painted on his face.

“great! well, you two go have fun, yeah? see you in a few hours.”

tyler honestly wanted to cry.

if there was anyone, and he means _anyone_ that he wouldn’t ever want to hang out with even for a minute, it was josh. but now he’d have to stay here for a few hours? tyler wondered what in the hell he did for god to hate him so much, enough to make josh dun the one he had to go on a date with.

after their moms had left to the next district, tyler goaned loudly and rolled his eyes, trying to find something to do other than hang out with josh. maybe he could ride the ferris wheel by himself or see how fast he could eat an elephant ear.

“this is tragic. why you?” josh asked, bitter.

“shut up. i’d rather hang out with clyde dinkle than you.”

josh gasped. “clyde dinkle? that’s low, even for you.”

tyler rolled his eyes again, sighing. “whatever, you numb-nut. i ho-”

“shut up, our parents are watching us right now.” josh said quickly, noticing their moms looking back at them as they continued their walk to the other district. “give me your stupid hand.”

“i’m not gonna-”

josh grabbed tyler’s hand, slipping his fingers through tyler’s and smiling sweetly at him. tyler stared at their intertwined hands, internally wanting to cry but still held a smile for josh as he gestured for them to walk.

“please, tell me when they’re not looking? your hands are disgustingly hard.” tyler complained, keeping up a casual pace with josh.

“and your hands are grossly soft, like a little girl’s.” josh retaliated.

“why _thank you.”_ tyler smiled sarcastically.

as soon as their moms disappeared into the second district josh pulled away from tyler, tyler flicking his hand as if there were germs festering on his palm.

“what do you want to do?” tyler asked, voice monotone as he looked around the fair.

he actually didn’t look bad, dressed in a white button up and black slacks, complete with converse, almost like tyler. they had something in common, but tyler still thought josh was stupid, and it was even more reason for tyler to get new clothes.

“get away from you.” josh said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“listen _joshua,_ i don’t wanna be here any more or less than you do. but our parents think we’re into each other, so what the heck do you want to do?” tyler asked again, annoyed.

josh was the one to roll his hazel eyes this time, scanning the pier for something to do with tyler.

“we could go into the funhouse.” he suggested, thinking the idea childish, but tyler was, too, so he didn’t think he’d have a problem with it.

“whatever. now you could finally see how ugly you look in the mirrors.” tyler joked, trying to hide his laugh when josh shook his head, a small smile threatening his mouth.

“you’re an ass. been one ever since freshman year.” josh said, leading tyler to the funhouse.

“okay, but you started it.”

“i did not. no one told you to wear rainbow suspenders on the first day.”

“no one told you to pay attention to me. but did you?”

josh rolled his eyes, making his way towards the house. the metal plates underneath them vibrated as they walked on the path, ascending into the actual funhouse.

“try not to let your stupid get in the way and walk into a wall.” josh said, walking quickly through the openings.

tyler wasn’t good at this, he hated these funhouses for a reason. if he was going to get a concussion, it wouldn’t be because he walked into an invisible wall.

not today.

he was sneaky with it, though, carefully following josh’s path so he wouldn’t have to do any work. he laughed loudly as josh ran into a wall himself.

“what happened to not letting your stupid get in the way?” tyler asked.

“blow me.” josh stuck his tongue out at tyler before making his way into another section of the funhouse.

it was the little rollie things that tyler liked, mainly because he’d slide across them instead of actually walking like a normal person.

“josh, josh. watch this.” tyler said, stepping in front of josh.

he backed up a bit, running forward and sliding across the rusty, yellow bars on the floor, trying to keep his balance. josh opted to walk across them, yet he somehow still managed to fall, and tyler almost peed himself laughing.

“josh, come on.” tyler said in between giggles.

“this is hard!” josh complained, trying to make it across the bars as quickly as he could, holding onto the railings for support.

tyler shook his head and made it into the mirrors that made you look like a crinkle-cut fry or a potato. not that he didn’t look like a potato on a daily, but, you get the gist.

“i look good like this.” tyler said, josh finally appearing through the doorway.

the dirty mirror had widened his hips and face, keeping his waist in.

“you look terrible, like always.”

“so now you notice how i look everyday?” tyler said, raising an eyebrow at josh.

“no! it was just a saying.” josh said a little overdramatically, as he was not about to have tyler think that he might have glanced at him every day at school, just curious to see if he got a new sweatshirt or jeans.

“and my name is josh. good thing it’s not, what an ugly name.”

“so is tyler. its ugly.”

“you’re ugly.”

“no, you’re ugly.”

tyler huffed, running from josh and sliding down the slide.

“wait! stop being so fast!” josh called, following after him down the slide.

tyler sighed deeply, looking at the house.

“that was fun.” tyler commented.

“for you. i fell twice.” josh frowned.

“that’s because you suck.” tyler booped his nose, causing josh to make a face.

josh and tyler eventually made it through the pier, tyler finally having enough time to ride all of the rides with an hour to spare. he actually was pretty happy, and he _actually_ had fun tonight, even with josh.

maybe, just maybe, he hated josh a little less.

maybe.

chances were slim, though.

“i’m hungry.” tyler said, his stomach empty.

“let me take you to dinner, then.” josh said, taking tyler’s hand.

“josh, our moms aren’t around.” tyler said, looking at their hands, confused.

“yeah, but we’re going to the second district where they are.”

tyler nodded, still kind of weary, but shrugged and let josh take his hand as he led him to the second district. they passed quite a few restaurants and clubs, each having a different environment and filled with different types of people. josh spotted his mom walking with tyler’s mom into a restaurant, josh’s mother the one to make eye contact with them.

“hey, guys!” laura greeted. “the date’s going well, i see.” she glanced at their linked hands, making tyler blush.

tyler was always one to get flustered at the slightest things. it was one thing to hold hands with someone, but now? that their _moms_ saw?

he could die.

“we were just about to go to dinner.” josh said.

“well, why don’t you eat with us? we just finished wine tasting.” tyler’s mom said.

“sure.” josh shrugged, looking to tyler.

tyler nodded, not really caring where they ate. all he wanted was to was eat, he was hungry.

the four had asked the lady at the front desk for a table, josh and tyler still holding hands as if it were a normal thing and they didn’t hate each other at all. tyler felt weird, his hand feeling like it was bubbling up and he wanted to pull away, but he couldn’t. he suspected josh was doing this because he knew their parents were around.

what an ass.

it was only when the lady gave them menus that josh and tyler finally stopped holding hands to flip through it.

“was tonight okay?” laura asked, resting her chin on her hand as she looked at the menu.

tyler looked to josh, waiting for him to respond. josh only gave him a look, and when tyler kept his mouth shut he kicked him underneath the table.

“yeah! it was fine.” tyler smiled, josh making a face at how fake he sounded.

after being all mopey and not looking forward to the date, kelly was happy he had the slightest bit of fun. the waitress came by shortly to take their orders, tyler opting for tacos and josh settling for a cheeseburger. as they talked to their moms and waited for their food to come, tyler discreetly shot josh glances, who in return did the same, and tyler would make a face at josh, immaturely going back and forth until josh kicked tyler again.

their moms didn’t know what was happening, and frankly, neither did tyler, but he here he was, not minding josh’s company for the first time in his life.

“tyler, what do you want to do for the future?” laura asked, just to make small talk.

“um...i want to be a musician. i’m into that kind of stuff, and i want to do something i love in the long run.”

“really? josh here wants to be a musician, too.”

tyler looked at josh, finding another thing in common with him.

disgusting.

“what do you play?” laura asked again.

tyler was about to speak when he felt something warm on his knee, dropping his eyes slightly to see it was josh’s hand. tyler’s heart began to beat, and his palms got sweaty. that was a romantic gesture, something that only _couples_ do. he didn’t understand, their parents can’t see under the table. they’ve only been dating for like, three hours and josh was already touching his knee and _wow,_ was he nervous.

“i, uh... i play the bass, and ukulele, and-and piano. i can kind of play the drums, but i’m...i’m not very good.”

josh’s hand travelled slightly upwards, but not enough to where tyler was freaking out. he took it as just am unconscious hand movement, glancing at josh, who flicked his tongue over his lips and listened to him and laura intently.

tyler would make sure to punch josh in the face the next time they were alone.

their food finally came, josh taking his hand off of tyler to eat. they eventually finished, laura making more small talk to try and get to know tyler, and honestly, he didn’t mind it. she was one of the few adults that he somewhat liked, because she was genuine and didn’t judge his choices of wanting to be a musician and skipping out on college, like most other adults.

“okay, well, it was nice meeting with you, dear.” laura said to tyler’s mom, who smiled in return as they left the restaurant.

“you too, laura.”

“i’ll be in the car, josh.” laura waved at them, walking away to the second district parking lot.

tyler looked at josh, then to his mother, silently telling her to go away so he could say bye to josh without it being even more awkward. tyler’s mom got the hint, making an “o” shape with her mouth before walking off quickly.

“i had fun today, i guess. i still hate you, though.” tyler said once his mom was out of earshot, crossing his arms.

“me too. the second part, not the first.” josh said, making tyler roll his eyes.

“our moms are watching.” tyler whispered, glancing behind josh’s shoulder to see his mom trying to subtly look at them.

it wasn’t very subtle.

“then we need to do something that makes it look like we like each other.”

“should i hug you?” tyler asked, his tone showing that he really didn’t want to, but josh just _had_ to be annoying.

“kiss me.” josh smirked.

“heck no i will not.”

“bet you won’t.”

“bet.” tyler’s tone changed; was josh really challenging him right now?

 _“i bet you won’t.”_ josh said again, a sly smile on his face. if there was one thing he knew about tyler, it’s that he never backs down from a challenge.

tyler grabbed josh’s collar, using all the courage he could muster and pressed his lips to his, shutting his eyes in the process. josh gasped through his nose, as he didn’t _actually think_ tyler would do it. his heart was beating in his ears, and he could barely hear anything going on around him except for the loud thumps in his chest. josh soon realized he needed to do something just in case his mom was still watching, and quickly rested his hands on tyler’s waist, shifting his head slightly to keep his nose from getting squished in between them.

tyler pulled away quickly, his face beginning to grow hot. that was bold as hell, but he was surprised josh went with it. josh blinked at tyler before embarrassment got the best of him and he hid his face in tyler’s shoulder.

“wow. now, i really hate you. bye, tyler.” josh smiled, letting go and beginning to walk back to his mom’s car.

“bye, josh.” tyler called. “don’t call me!”

“whatever!”

tyler walked back to his mom as well, except her car was parked in the first district lot, so he went to the right instead of the left with josh. he shoved his shaking hands in his pockets, replaying what just happened in his head. it made his heart flutter the more he thought about it, but he decided to just brush it off as pretend.

it was just for show, right?


	4. .forbidden love!.

“tyler, my man!” brendon said, sitting at the lunch table with tyler. “what did you do on saturday? i was calling you to see if you wanted to grab milkshakes with me, but you wouldn’t pick up.” he pouted, resting his head in his hands.

“i was busy.” tyler said, his eyes never meeting brendon.

there was no way he would tell brendon that he went on a fake date with josh. he felt dirty, unclean, like he was still holding josh’s hand or kissing him.

yikes.

“doing what? jack-”

“no!” tyler cut him off, brendon making a face. “i...i went out. on a...date.”

brendon blinked at tyler, sitting up. “with _whom?_ “

“it’s not that impor-”

“who did you go with?” brendon tilted his head, his stare really making tyler believe that he was insane.

“uh...j-josh.”

brendon gasped dramatically, getting up from his seat and tugging at his hair, staring at the table in thought. a few people from behind him looked over to see what the hell this kid was standing up for.

“brendon, what are you doing? sit down!”

“you went on a _fucking_ date with him and you didn’t even tell me? why? how did that even happen? where did you go? did you kiss him? did you-” brendon gasped again, sitting down and leaning towards tyler. “did you fuck?”

“can you stop?” tyler’s cheeks were warm at this point. “it was pretend. our parents are neighbors, remember?”

brendon made a confused face. “you guys pretend fucked? on the first date?”

“no!” tyler groaned.

“oh, my god. this is awful. this is terrible. do you know what’s going to happen now?” brendon asked, grabbing tyler’s shoulders, causing him to shoo his hands away.

“nothing. i told him not to call me.”

“you think he’ll listen? what’s gonna happen, is that you two idiots are going to fall for each other, when you know damn well you can’t because the whole school knows you hate each other. then, you’re gonna get your heart broken when you can’t be together. patrick was so right about this!”

“patrick was right about what?” as if on cue, the kid came, sitting down next to brendon, sipping his soda can.

“tyler and josh! they’re like romeo and juliet. forbidden love!” he whisper-shouted.

“what?” patrick said, confused.

“they went on a _date_ saturday!”

patrick choked on his soda, tyler rolling his eyes and sighing. he was friends with dummies.

“you two belong in the looney bin.” tyler commented, watching them freak out over nothing.

“no, you do. you’re dating josh.” brendon retaliated.

“we’re not _dating,_ now stop saying that! it was for pretend!”

“pretend my ass. watch, he’s going to _pretend_ call you soon, then you _have_ to pretend pick it up and have a conversation with him, then he’s going to ask you on another pretend date, and then you’re going to fall pretend in love. you act like i’m stupid.” brendon said.

“you are.” tyler got up, grabbing his bag from the floor as the bell rang. “goodbye.”

“forbidden love!” brendon called, making tyler roll his eyes again.


	5. .smallbands.

“listen, tyler. laura and i are going out tonight again. call a friend.” kelly said, poking her head into tyler’s room.

“i have no friends.” tyler said, not looking up at her from his laptop.

“then, i’ll tell her to invite josh over.” kelly nodded to herself, as if it was a good idea.

“no, no. nevermind, i have friends. it’s okay.”

“what? don’t you like josh?” she asked.

“uh...no. i don’t think it’s going to work out.” tyler said, really hoping she believed him.

“tyler, please. if you don’t want to date him, at least be friends with him.”

“no, thank you.”

“i’m telling laura.” kelly said, leaving his room.

tyler sighed, trying to think of what to do. he could pretend he was hanging out with josh, but then they would just go stay home until their parents got back and act like they had a fun time. he could also ditch him, but he wasn’t _that_ mean.

well, maybe.

tyler heard the front door open downstairs, and a couple of voices talking to one another, assuming it was laura. he listened, his mother telling her _we should totally get them together while we’re out!_ and _why not have him come over to the house?_

he could die. he stopped listening after that.

“tyler! we’re leaving! call josh!” his mom called from downstairs, shutting the door behind her.

“i won’t!” tyler said to himself, scrolling through his phone.

he missed a call from brendon. pressing his name, he held the phone to his ear and waited for his voice.

“tyler! listen, patrick, dallon, and i are going to watch pete perform at smallbands in a couple of hours. you comin’?” he asked quickly.

“um...sure. i’ll meet you there?”

“no, i’ll pick you up. be ready in twenty so we could get a good view.”

and with that, brendon hung up. tyler made a face, trying to think of what he would wear for it. it was a small venue, and he’d be watching pete perform. this was good, he was supporting a new friend instead of hanging out with josh. after taking a quick shower, he went to his closet, pushing through his clothes and pulling out a slightly ripped up band tee. he shrugged, slipping it on. he found his torn, black jeans and searched through his closet again for a jean jacket.

he looked in the mirror, nodding in moderate acceptance at his reflection.

“i think i’ll wear a hat today.” tyler said to himself, going into the bathroom again to blow dry his hair.

he heard brendon sound his horn outside as soon as he ran his fingers through his dried hair, grabbing a wide rimmed, black hat from the top of his closet and his keys from the desk near the door. he groaned, brendon continuing to honk his horn just to be annoying and screw with the neighbors. he left, flicking brendon off on the way to the car, seeing him inaudibly laugh from the inside of his car.

“you look like a hipster.” brendon commented, handing tyler a milkshake that was halfway melted, but he appreciated the gift nonetheless.

“good. thank you.” he buckled his seatbelt, waving to patrick and dallon in the backseat.

“what type of band do they have again?” brendon asked after trying to find a decent song on the radio to listen to, glancing at dallon and pete in the rearview mirror.

“they?” tyler asked, drinking his milkshake.

“pete and josh.” dallon said, looking at tyler.

he almost choked to death. “josh?”

“didn’t brendon tell you? we’re going to see their band.” dallon smiled, making tyler groan.

“oops.” brendon giggled, turning the street corner.

“you lied to me?” tyler asked, feeling betrayed.

 _“no,”_ brendon said, “i just omitted small truths to manipulate you. too late to back out, now. the venue’s right there. you’re there for pete, our new bestie.”

tyler rolled his eyes, finishing the milkshake. “i guess, so.”

“at least you look cute, though. you could _wow_ josh.” brenond said dramatically, tyler rolling his eyes.

“you suck.”

tyler followed brendon and patrick into the venue, keeping his pace with dallon behind them. he wasn’t really friends with dallon, but he knew he was close to brendon and they would hang out occasionally. he was very nice.

pretty tall, too.

“you and josh hate each other or something?” dallon asked, his hands in his pockets as he stood in the crowd, looking at the purple lights that set the stage.

“very much, since freshman year. if i knew he’d be here...” tyler said, knowing he sounded like an ass.

he trailed off, though, deciding he was here for pete.

“maybe you should give him a chance. people change.” dallon suggested, shrugging.

“it’s been three years, and he still does the same shit. i try not to, but it’s annoying sometimes.” tyler said.

“what if he likes you?” dallon looked to tyler.

“disgusting.”

dallon chuckled, shaking his head. “we do that sometimes. bother people as a way to say that we’re into them. i don’t know, but maybe you should try.”

tyler’s eyes flicked back and forth across the floor of the venue, thinking. he was about to tell dallon that he was out of his mind, but then he heard a kick drum begin to beat in his chest, looking up to see josh with his pink hair underneath a backwards snapback, starting a song. pete started playing himself, and the two other people that tyler didn’t know began to sing.

“i never knew josh played.” tyler said loudly to brendon, his voice cutting through the song.

“neither did i.” brendon said, lightly nodding to the music. “he’s good, isn’t he?”

tyler glanced up again, seeing josh bang his head with the beat of the drums, and tyler could tell he was putting his soul into it with the little smile that quirked his mouth as he played. he really was talented.

“he’s trash.” 

brendon gave tyler a look, turning his attention back to the band and moving with the music. tyler only watched, still surprised at how good they were. he also didn’t know pete was in a band, either. of course, he had only known the guy for a few hours, but still. tyler bit his bottom lip out of habit, studying the stage set up and band members while the beat bumped in his heart, racking his ribcage and shaking his stomach.

he loved live music.

his eyes trailed over josh, who had noticed him while looking at the faces of the crowd, making a confused face, where his eyebrows would bunch and his lips spread into a frown, but he looked like he was smiling. tyler’s eyes went wide, his heart pounding in confrontation. he quickly averted his gaze somewhere else, as if he didn’t even see josh. a few people of the crowd turned their heads to see what the cute drummer was staring at, tyler tipping his hat a little more to hide his flustered face.

wow, he hated josh.


	6. .no calling.

the concert had ended, tyler having fun and making a few friends as well.

he didn’t like talking to new people, but the blonde girl he met was really friendly, as well as the girl that came with her. he forgot their names, but he was pretty sure the blonde was name gemma and the other one was nelly. they had planned to hang out soon, in which he didn’t mind. it would give him an excuse to not hang out with josh anymore.

he was waiting outside with brendon, dallon, and patrick. they insisted on congratulating josh and pete when they came out, but tyler needed to go home, and the walk was pretty far from here.

“pete! josh! good job!” brendon shouted, josh opening his arms for a hug, throwing them over brendon.

“thank you guys for coming!” josh said, giving patrick a hug as well, and then only tyler was left.

josh quirked an eyebrow, tyler shaking his head. “uh-uh.”

“you know you want a hug.” josh said, walking towards tyler.

“you know i do not. you’re all sweaty and gross.” tyler said, making a face.

“even better. it’s makes it more intimate.”

and soon tyler was getting wrapped up in a hug from a sweaty josh, squealing as he picked him up with ease and spun him around, and tyler couldn’t help but giggle from the adrenaline of being off of the ground.

“ah! josh! put me down! you’re sweaty!” tyler whined, josh burying his face in tyler’s neck.

“thank you for coming, ty!” josh said, making tyler frown and putting him down.

“i really hate you even more now.” tyler said, feeling icky.

“nice hat.” josh commented, just to get underneath tyler’s skin.

“nice b.o.”

josh only laughed, throwing his head back. he patted tyler’s head, who rolled his eyes with a smile, turning back to brendon.

“seriously, thank you guys. i didn’t think you were actually going to come.”

“of course. for you,” brendon looked at tyler, “and for pete.” then he looked at patrick.

“where is pete?” patrick asked softly, not wanting to bring attention to the fact that he was holding a small teddy bear in his hands as a “you did really good!” gift.

“hey! pete!” josh cupped his hands over his mouth, his voice echoing through the night.

pete turned from the two girls tyler made friends with earlier, telling him that he’d be back and jogging over to them.

“hey, guys!” pete greeted, brendon and dallon waving to him.

“good job!” patrick said, holding the teddy bear out for him.

“awe, patty.” pete said dramatically, making tyler chuckle. “you shouldn’t have.”

patrick rolled his eyes, pete holding the bear in his hands.

“alright, well, our moms should be home soon, tyler. i’m going to go.” josh said.

“oh, shoot. i forgot about that.”

“do you want me to take you home?” josh offered.

“nope.” tyler shook his head.

brendon squinted his eyes at tyler, who gave him a warning glance when he saw brendon flick his eyes back and forth between him and josh.

“well, actually, dallon and i wanted to check out the venue with pete and patrick. see the, uh...the lights and shit.” brendon said. “you need to go home right now, don’t you?”

tyler internally groaned, blowing out a breath and looking at brendon.

“guess you have to! bye!” brendon said, and as if the others were on cue, they all ran away from them, leaving tyler and josh by themselves.

“i really need some new friends.” tyler said to himself, resting his hands on the top of his head and stretching, watching them leave.

“well, let’s go.” josh said, pulling his keys out of his pocket and unlocking his car.

it was black, and small. tyler liked cars like this. he got in, putting on his seatbelt and crossing his arms, staring out the window. josh noticed this, making a face and starting up the car. it was awkward, to say the least. tyler only unfolded his arms to wave hi to gemma and nelly as josh drove past them.

“you know jenna and debby?” josh asked, glancing over to him as he turned the corner.

“you mean gemma and nelly?”

josh scoffed. “gemma and nelly? wow, you really do have bad memory.”

tyler rolled his eyes. “whatever.”

josh pressed the radio button to combat the awkward silence they were drenched in, a song tyler had never heard before playing. josh’s eyes blew wide, quickly changing the station to the radio.

“what was that?” tyler asked, a smile threatening his mouth when he saw josh’s expression.

“nothing. don’t worry about it, nosey.”

“play it.”

“no.”

tyler waited until josh placed both hands on the wheel to pressed the cd button, and the song began playing again. josh sighed.

“is that you?” tyler giggled, josh’s voice in the background of the song while he played drums, tyler assuming.

“it might be.” josh said.

“you sound, like, not awful. still bad, but not that bad.”

“wow, thanks. always love a good compliment.” josh smiled, stopping his car in front of tyler’s house. “get out.”

“love to.” tyler had his hand on the door handle, but stopped when he saw his mom and laura walking from josh’s house to his.

he sighed, making a face like he was about to cry. “now they’re going to look over here.” he whined.

“they might not.”

“oh, yeah, because it’s just completely normal to see a black car in the middle of the street, parking in front of a little boy’s house.”

“you’re almost eighteen.”

tyler was about to say something, but his mom made eye contact with him, waving at them. they waved back, tyler gulping because they were standing in front of the house to try and be subtle, keeping an eye on them.

it wasn’t very subtle.

“they’re watching.” tyler said through his teeth, a fake smile plastered on his face.

“ty?” josh asked, a smirk on his face.

“wh-”

tyler was cut off when josh caught his lips in a kiss, holding the back of his neck with his free hand. tyler shifted his head, breathing out of his nose in surprise, but shut his eyes too to make it look like he was enjoying it. he brought his hand up to josh’s cheek, making a small sound as if to tell josh to stop, but it sounded like he meant the complete opposite. tyler pulled back after a moment anyways, their foreheads still together and their noses barely touching. his eyes were still closed as josh brushed his lips against his.

“get out.” josh smiled.

“ass.” tyler commented, smiling and leaving the car. “bye, josh!” tyler shouted, loud enough for their moms to hear.

josh waved at tyler before speeding off right next door, pulling into the driveway and quickly disappearing inside of his house, tyler doing the same.

“wow, i would have thought you and josh were in love with each other after that.” kelly commented, pursing her lips.

tyler sputtered, trying to come up with something to say to make her think they weren’t ever going to work out, ever, but his words were trying to run back into his throat. she was right; after seeing that, it was pointless.

“right. well, i’m going to bed, don’t stay up too late. school tomorrow.”

“goodnight, mom.” tyler said, his mom kissing his forehead before trudging up the stairs.

tyler felt a buzz in his pocket, taking his phone out to see that he got a message from brendon.

 **b:** _did you guys get home?_

 **t:** _i wanna fight you_

 **b:** _wow, excuse me for trying to be polite and get you a man_

tyler scoffed, rolling his eyes with a smile before looking down again, brendon sending him another message.

 **b:** _pete said to call him. 614-386-3425_ **(yes i may have spelled dun dick with numbers but that’s irrelevant)**

 **t:** _for what?_

 **b:** _just call the kid_

tyler pressed the number, holding the phone up to his ear and hearing the dial tone. pete picked up the phone.

except, it wasn’t pete.

“tyler?” josh asked, his tone disgusted.

“what the heck?”

“how did you get my number?”

“how did you know it was me calling?”

“brendon.”

“mmm.” tyler made a face. “well, bye.”

“wait!”

tyler sighed, holding the phone to his ear again. “what?”

“look outside your window.”

“are you gonna be there in a hoodie with one of those ugly signs asking me to prom?”

“maybe.”

tyler sighed and looked outside of his window, josh still on the line, and tyler heard his stupid laugh over the phone when he saw his face. josh was outside on his front yard with a hoodie on, holding up a giant white paper sign that hastily read “you’re ugly!” in red letters. tyler shook his head, squinting at josh as he shut his blinds, blocking him out.

“aw. you didn’t have to be such a pooper.” josh pouted.

“i hate you. you’re so extra.”

“you love me!”

“i hate you.”

“what’s your least favorite color?” josh asked.

“ugh, yellow. it’s the worst. why?”

“just asking. alright, bye.”

“goodbye.”

tyler hung up the phone, biting the inside of his bottom lip in thought as he looked at his phone. he sighed, plopping himself down on the bed and staring at the ceiling. he just broke his own rule.

no calling.


	7. .josh's hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hELP i'm being aTTACKED by a mosquit
> 
> it's honestly so disrespectful like he just came up in my room, UNINVITED, trying to eat me like did i ask for this? did i give you permission?? how r00d but anyways
> 
> thank you guys so so much for being so awesome
> 
> i love you c:
> 
> enjoy!

brendon was telling tyler an embarrassing story about patrick, his voice drowned out by the thoughts buzzing in his head like white noise. he couldn’t stop thinking about yesterday, he felt like josh’s lips were still moving against his, or like his hands were still on the back of his neck, making goosebumps prickle his skin. he felt like he was wrapped in a hug of memories, and no matter how hard he tried to get out of its grip, he couldn’t stop replaying that certain one in his head.

“tyler, what are you thinking about?” brendon asked, seeing him take his bottom lip in between his teeth out of habit, not listening. he only did that when he thought extra hard.

“n-nothing.” tyler shook his head, brendon squinting at him.

“tell me.”

“no.”

“josh?” brendon tilted his head, making a face when tyler’s cheeks became pink.

“maybe.”

“did he kiss you again?”

“maybe.” tyler said, dragging out the word.

brendon scoffed, shaking his head. he turned to patrick, who sighed heavily and rolled his eyes, fishing a crumpled up ten dollar bill out of his pocket and begrudgingly placing it in brendon’s hand. tyler snatched the bill, looking at it.

“you bet on me?!”

“i need extra money.” brendon shrugged.

“that is disrespectful.” tyler pouted.

“hey, you can’t get mad. you’re crushing on josh dun. that’s even more disrespectful.”

“aren’t you and josh friends?”

“of course. but you two hate each other. unless-”

“i don’t give a crap about josh dun.” tyler defended, brendon giving him a look.

tyler blinked at him, frowning. he sighed, giving him back the ten dollar bill and holding his head in his hands.

“brendon, do you not understand how awful this is? he’s like...playing stupid, little mind games with me. it’s like we don’t actually hate each other, like we’re friends who annoy each other. like me and you.”

“no, no. you shouldn’t compare good and evil. that’s why the black and white are separate in the yin and yang.” brendon said.

“but there’s a little bit of both in them.”

brendon blinked at tyler, who put his hands in the air in defense. “just sayin’.”

“what about romeo and juliet? i want ty and josh to be together.” patrick said, drinking his sprite.

“so you want them to die of a broken heart?”

“they died of poison, stupid.”

“technically, they died of a broken heart. that could happen, you know. when you look at the emoti-”

“you guys are like theatre nerds.” tyler said.

“literature.” brendon corrected, seeing tyler give him a look. “plays are just a visual aspect to those that don’t fuck with written art but anyways,” **(@ me next time)** tyler rolled his eyes, ““i think you should do what your heart desires. josh is a cool kid, but knowing you two, he’d squash it.”

“brendon.”

“i’m serious. or if you do go for it, be careful. just know i’ll be here for you, and we could drown our feelings in ice cream.”

“what do you got to be sad about?” tyler asked.

“nothing, i just like ice cream.”

tyler nodded, frowning. he looked up curiously towards the opening cafeteria doors, seeing pete, dallon, and josh laughing at something pete was telling him. tyler gasped to himself in disbelief, staring at josh’s hair.

“what?” brendon asked.

“that...son of a... _penis.”_ tyler said, his blood boiling.

brendon snickered at tyler’s choice of words, knowing he wasn’t one to cuss as much as he did. he turned to see what tyler was so mad about, josh’s hair a different color. josh glanced up, instantly seeing tyler and raising his eyebrows, a smug look on his face telling tyler that he knew what he was doing. he saw tyler’s expression, and winked at him before leaving pete to go sit with his other friends. tyler’s breath hitching when pete stopped josh and gestured his head towards their table. josh was about to shake his head, but then he flicked his eyes over towards tyler, and now they both were coming towards the table.

it’s like his luck couldn’t get any worse.

especially when josh sat right next to tyler, even though there were empty seats everywhere.

“hi.” he waved to brendon and patrick, who returned the gesture.

“hi, tyler.” josh said, going to put his arm around tyler to be annoying, but he pushed him back.

“whoa. stay in your lane, kid.”

“that’s new.” josh chuckled, tyler huffing. “spicy.”

nevermind, he really did hate this kid.

“nice ugly, yellow hair.” tyler said, taking a strand of it and twirling it with his finger. “it’s soft, like you actually wash it.”

“i don’t know whether to say thanks or not.” josh said, sighing through his nose. “listen, my mom’s been talking to me about inviting you over for dinner. i told her no, that it was a bad idea because you have really bad stomach problems, but she insisted.” josh said.

tyler’s mouth dropped open. “you told her i had _stomach problems?”_

josh only laughed. “it didn’t work, anyways.”

“i really hate you, josh dun.” tyler said.

he pouted, and this time he didn’t move when josh put his arm around him again, his soft sweater tickling the back of his neck.

“but, she wants you over tonight, if that’s possible?” josh asked tyler lowly, and tyler felt icky.

like he was actually talking to someone who cared about him.

“it’s not plausible.” tyler said, raising his eyebrows and focusing his attention on josh’s hand near his face, playing with josh’s fingers.

“so...” josh thought, “it’s possible that you can come to dinner tonight...but it’s plausible...that you won’t because you’re mean?”

tyler sighed. “fine. i’ll go, if it would shut you up. is my mom going?”

“i would assume.” josh shrugged.

the bell for lunch to end rang, tyler pulling josh’s arm away from him and grabbing his backpack. “i’ll see you tonight, then, stupid.”

“jerk.”

tyler smiled, walking out of the cafeteria. josh watched him leave, biting the bottom of his lip in thought. he eyes trailed to the floor once he left, remembering that he was supposed to hate tyler.

which he did, those skinny jeans looked awful.

“hey, lover boy. don’t fuck up my friend.” brendon said, squinting at josh and pointing at his eyes with two fingers, then back at josh.

josh rolled his own, not taking him seriously. “would never dream of it.”

ever.


	8. .pretend, pretend, pretend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aye
> 
> do i have the ending planned out? 
> 
> lil bit
> 
> do i know how to get there?
> 
> lil bit
> 
> am i having a tough time?
> 
> lil bit
> 
> but we're gonna get there, because that's what we do, man. we get there
> 
> thank you guys so much for reading! i appreciate it v v much
> 
> you
> 
> yah u
> 
> you're appreciated by me, thank you c:
> 
> enjoy!!

“i’ll go pick up tyler, then.” josh said, brushing his hands off on his pants when he was done setting up the table.

kelly nodded, mixing something in a big metal bowl, giving josh a smile. josh politely returned the gesture, leaving the house and starting the short walk to tyler’s house.

“tyler!” josh called from outside his window, but after seeing the blinds still shut after a few seconds, he pulled his phone out.

“what?” tyler asked.

“hey, darling!” josh said annoyingly, and he could almost see tyler rolling his eyes. “get down here, i’m picking you up in my sweet ride.”

“you drove two seconds over here?”

“look out your window.”

josh was still staring at the window, his neck starting to ache a bit. tyler opened his blinds and unlocked it, peering his head out and looking at josh. josh waved at him, looking tiny from where tyler was, and he couldn’t help but giggle.

“your smile is so cute. too bad you’re always frowning.” josh pouted.

“awe, babe.” tyler said dramatically. “it’s kind of hard to smile when i’m around you twenty-four seven.”

“wow, you’re going to make me tear up. get down here.”

josh hung up the phone, still looking up as tyler rolled his eyes, shutting his window. he turned around, looking at the street they were on and sighing. winter was coming, the trees beginning to lose their leaves and the air beginning to get sharper. it wouldn’t be long until the sky would turn grey permanently and he’d be inside drinking hot chocolate. he sighed in content, loving the weather these days.

he shouted in surprise when he felt something attack him from the back, jumping on him and wrapping their legs around his waist. he groaned when he heard tyler’s giggle in his ear, his hands around his shoulders.

“what are you doing?” josh asked, tyler kicking his legs, like an excited little kid.

“you’re my bitch. take me to your house.” tyler said, josh leaning forwards and making tyler cling onto him, giggling even more.

“with that attitude?” josh asked, holding onto the bottom of tyler’s thighs so that he wouldn’t fall.

tyler pouted, resting his head on josh’s shoulders while he thought. “hmm...pretty please with chocolate sprinkles on top?”

“ew, chocolate?”

“rainbow?”

“now, we’re talking.”

josh began to walk over to his house, tyler bouncing with ever step josh took.

“am i heavy?” tyler asked.

he’d always get insecure.

“as hell. but lucky for you, i work out.”

tyler gasped softly.

“i’m just kidding. you’re fine.” josh said, almost there.

“you know, if someone told me that i’d be getting a piggy back ride from my worst enemy, i’d fight them.”

“uh, huh. and if someone told _me_ that i might...maybe enjoy your company a little bit, i’d vomit.”

“you enjoy my company?” tyler asked, surprised.

“key words _maybe_ and _might.”_

tyler rolled his eyes. resting his head on josh’s shoulder again. “you smell nice. a good change to everyday when you smell bad.”

“shut up. i smell nice everyday.”

“eh.”

josh only shook his head, tyler smiling and getting off of josh back when they reached his house. josh smoothened out his hair, opening the door and seeing the table was set up with food already. kelly and laura had already sat down, leaving seats open for them to sit next to each other.

wow, how considerate.

tyler walked over to his seat, about to sit down, but josh rushed towards the chair first. tyler stopped, seeing josh pull the chair out for him. tyler only blushed in response, keeping his head down as he sat, josh smiling widely in front of him.

“how is everything going so far?” laura asked, cutting into her food.

“um...pretty good. everything’s good.” tyler spoke up, nodding.

“good. josh told me you had problems with your stomach, so let me know if you need me to change the food.” laura smiled, tyler’s eyes blowing wide.

he fucking forgot about that.

he looked over to his mom, who was staring at him with a confused expression, then to josh, who was trying not to laugh, covering his mouth.

“wh-”

“aw! i th-think it’s getting to me!” tyler said, trying to avoid all questions with his mother. “i need to go to the restroom!”

“upstairs to the right.” laura said quickly, worried.

tyler rushed away from the table in embarrassment, shutting the bathroom door once he got there. he could _strangle_ josh right now. his ears were hot with embarrassment as he closed the door to the bathroom and sat on the little carpet against the sink, trying to calm his warm face.

“uh...” josh looked back, trying to suppress his smile. “i’ll go and check on him.”

josh rushed away from the table as well, jogging up the stairs and knocking on the door. “tyler?”

“go the heck away.” tyler said, lowly so their parents wouldn’t hear.

“come in? well, you gotta unlock the door first.” josh said loudly.

tyler sighed in defeat, opening the door and crawling back to his spot on the floor. “you’re the absolute worst.”

josh shut the door again and sat down on the floor in front of tyler, still amused.

“that was funny.” he said after a moment.

“it was not! now my mom thinks i have stomach problems!” tyler said.

“that’s not funny.” josh shook his head after hearing tyler say it out loud.

tyler had an angry expression on his face, crossing his arms over his chest and looking at the floor. he looked over at josh, who was staring at him and trying not to smile, knowing tyler couldn’t be taken seriously. tyler tried to stay mad, but with josh’s face like that, he started to laugh.

“i really hate you.” tyler said, sighing.

“listen, if we really want to convince our parents that we don’t hate each other, you can’t say that so loud.” josh frowned.

“they already think we like each other. i think we’ve done a pretty good job.”

“not really. my mom always asks why she has to make me ask you out.”

“why do you care so much? i don’t like you.” tyler said.

“just...make sure you convince them enough, okay? that’s all i’m saying, stupid.”

tyler huffed, leaning against the bathroom counter. josh did the same, looking at the blank canvas of a white wall and thinking to himself. tyler only broke it when he thought about what he was going to do tomorrow, remembering that there was a history exam.

“there’s a test tomorrow, in fifth.” he said.

josh groaned, knowing he’d fail and continue lowering his c average in her class. tyler bit his bottom lip, thinking even more. he was supposed to have higher grades than josh, which he did, but he couldn’t just let the dummy fail.

it was mean.

“i’ll help you study. let’s go.” he said, getting up.

“you? help me? study?”

“yes, i don’t want you to fail. get the heck up so we could go.” tyler said, holding his hand out for josh to take.

“your hands are still soft i see.” josh commented.

“and you’re still ugly, but i don’t say anything.”

“do you actually think i’m ugly?” josh asked.

“no, why are you getting so self-conscious about yourself?”

“i’m not, i just wanted to hear you say it.” josh said.

tyler rolled his eyes and sighed, a tiny blush taking to his cheeks. josh called to his mom that they were going to study, kelly telling them that she was leaving and for tyler to be home before midnight. he’d try his best to get out of here as quickly as he could. he saw down on josh’s bed, josh rummaging through his backpack and pulling out a black binder. it had the word “history” written on it. tyler sat crisscross-applesauce, josh plopping down right next to him and pulling out his notes. he looked at tyler with his big eyes, waiting for him to tell him what to do.

he had no clue.

tyler only smiled softly, making josh feel a bit better about knowing absolutely nothing on this quiz, taking his notes and flipping through them.

“hmm.” he said. “okay, well, first thing’s first, what are we studying?”

“ottoman.”

“was it a gunpowder empire?”

“yeah. it resisted because it didn’t want to be corrupted, in a sense.”

“why?”

“because it’s in turkey? near expanding empires?” josh said, making a face and shaking his head, unsure of his answer.

“good.” **(tbh i don’t know if it’s correct school was like two months ago rip)**

tyler and josh continued like this for a while, josh getting stuck a few times, but tyler was able to pull him out of that hole.

“wow, tyler, i’m surprised. you’re not stupid.” josh said.

tyler rolled his eyes. “of course, not.”

“how do you get good grades?”

tyeler shrugged. “study a lot. write notes. if you need to, and only if you really, really, _really_ need to, i could always come over and help you with anything.”

“awe, does ty care about little ol’ me?” josh asked, leaning on tyler’s shoulder to be annoying.

“mmm...” tyler thought, “maybe a tiny bit. still hate you though.”

“you love me!” josh shouted, making tyler giggle and cover josh’s mouth at his sudden outburst.

“sh!”

josh stared at tyler’s hand covering his mouth, tyler making a face when he felt josh’s smile wickedly into his palm. he removed his hand before josh did anything stupid.

“you know what would be even smarter?” josh asked, tyler tilting his head. “a date on saturday.”

“wow, josh we’re moving pretty fast. we’ve been on three dates already in the span of two weeks. i might be falling for you.” tyler said, rolling his eyes.

“shut up and date me. i’m picking you up.”

“where would we even go?” tyler asked.

“what’s your least favorite place to go?”

“i really hate that gross cafe by the corner. their coffee is awful.”

“you don’t even drink coffee.” josh said.

“exactly. coffee is gross, that’s why i know it’s awful.”

“good, so i’ll take you there.”

tyler rolled his eyes, sighing and looking down at his lap. “well, i’ll get going.”

he felt weird, being next to josh like this. he was pretty close, and he did smell good, though tyler told him he didn’t. josh must have, too, because he was looking at him, like he needed to say something, but he was scared to. his hazel eyes cautiously studied his lips, like they were a national geographic photographer, and tyler was the lion. tyler saw this, gnawing on the inside of his bottom lip out of habit and nerves. his palms began to get sweaty, his gaze trained on josh’s sheets instead of him. he was blushing by now, his cheeks hot because he didn’t know what was going on, or what he was even supposed to do, but josh was staring at him like he was the only thing on this planet and his heart was in his throat..

“wh-what?” tyler asked, smiling out of insecurity.

josh slowly used two fingers underneath tyler’s chin, pushing his mouth up. tyler tried to be cool, keeping everything together. he shut his eyes before before leaning in hesitantly, his breath stuck. it shouldn’t have, though; he’s pretend-kissed josh a bunch of times recently. josh had finally pressed his lips to tyler’s, and tyler had _finally_ kissed him back, feeling like he could explode.

there was something different about this one; being alone with someone who you weren’t supposed to catch feelings for really pushed that rebellion inside of tyler’s heart, and if anything, made it worse. it made every laugh that josh had managed to pull out of tyler worse, it made every touch to his sensitive skin worse, and it made trying not to catch feelings _worse._

what they were doing right now?

this was awful.

his mouth held against tyler’s like soft clay, and instead of having his hands placed awkwardly at his side, his rested one on josh’s neck and the other on his shoulder, somehow making the kiss feel better, if that made sense. josh had pulled back a little, his lips brushing over tyler’s own for a moment before tyler had completely pulled his lips away from josh, but their foreheads were still touching. he swallowed, opening his eyes studying josh’s as if they were holding the punchline.

_this was a joke, tyler! now i know you have feelings for me! :)_

“that was pretend?” tyler asked, the question stupid, as he should know the answer.

“sure.” josh said, his voice smooth, as if he knew what he was doing – yet he didn’t.

“right.” tyler nodded, turning away from him in disappointment. “i’ll be next door.”


	9. .whoa!.

“i’m telling you, something was off about it.” tyler said, holding his head in his hands.

he couldn’t stop thinking about it, even when he went to sleep last night. he felt like one of those girls in the movies, that would freak out over something like this, except they actually get their man in the end.

tyler?

yikes.

“so, what? you felt something? what’s so different about it?” brendon asked.

“brendon!” tyler whined, his heart aching when he realized what was going on.

“you’re catching feelings aren’t you?”

tyler stayed silent, the question catching him off guard even though he knew it was coming.

“if you don’t answer in the next ten seconds, i’ll just assume – hey! josh!” brendon said, looking up at the brightly haired kid waving at him as he walked in with pete and dallon to the cafeteria.

tyler was slightly shaking, and his palms were almost just never dry these days. he felt josh sit next to him, but his cheeks were really red right now and that last thing he wanted was for-

“ty, you okay?” josh asked, poking his hair.

“uh-huh.” tyler said, his voice muffled in his shirt, squeezing his eyes shut.

“he’s uh...a little sick.” brendon said.

dallon looked at tyler, then at brendon, who nodded slightly once he saw that eyebrow raise. dallon sighed, chuckling and glancing at tyler again.

“do you want me to make you soup? i have stuff at my house i could bring later.” josh offered, his voice soft.

“no, it’s okay.” tyler had finally stopped hiding his face, looking at josh.

see, he was going to say something, but something about the fluffy curls in josh’s hair today or the way his shirt was wrinkled really got to him, and he felt like he just got attacked. even more so, tyler was confused; normally, josh would say something like “ew, i’m leaving, you’re gross” or “disgusting, you’re going to get me sick”, but he just offered him soup, and for a moment tyler thought josh was the sweetest, but then he remembered he wasn’t. **(aCtUaLLy-)**

“are you guys still pretend dating?” brendon asked, curious.

“yeah. still hate him, but our parents think we don’t.” josh spoke up, tyler biting the inside of his lip at the way his voice sounded.

“then why do you come and sit with me everyday?” tyler asked, smirking when josh hesitated.

“because,” he furrowed his eyebrows, “i come for pete, and brendon, and patrick and dallon.” he said matter-of-factly.

tyler rolled his eyes, groaning when josh put his arm around him and hugged him close, just to be annoying. it seemed like he was being extra annoying sometimes

“you’re gross.” tyler said, making a face.

“you love me.”

“i hate you.” tyler said, looking at josh.

tyler saw josh’s eyes flick to his pouty lips, deciding something by the way he bit his bottom lip in thought, but he looked away before tyler could say something.

he sighed.


	10. .;).

josh’s mom was gone for a few days, and kelly hadn’t minded that tyler went over to josh’s after school considering they were right next door. tyler had been over a lot, doing nothing but watching movies and eating out all of josh’s leftover ice cream with him. now, they were on josh’s bed, somehow being okay with this position, yet tyler’s heart was in his throat at the thought of messing something up, or saying the wrong thing. he always got nervous around josh, but this was something else.

“look at us being all coupley and stuff.” tyler commented, mindlessly tracing circles on josh’s chest, listening to the rhythm of josh’s steady heartbeat while his head rose and fell with every soft breath he took.

josh chuckled, tyler smiling himself when he felt josh’s chest vibrate, his little laughs filling his ears.

“i know. it’s disgusting.” josh said, hugging tyler closer to him and staring at the ceiling, his mind racing.

he glanced out the window to distract himself, the weather gross. rain was dripping down his window as drops hit the glass, the sky completely dull and empty, except for the low crashes of thunder from far away and birds calling as they hightailed away from it.

“this pretend dating stuff is tiring.” tyler said, his eyelids beginning to threaten him with sleep as he stared out of the window, too.

rainy weather always made him sleepy.

josh swallowed.

“then stop.”

tyler looked up at josh, his heartbeat thumping fast in his ears, his eyes trained on the ceiling.

“what?” tyler asked.

“stop pretending.” josh said, looking down at tyler and smiling when he saw his face. “date me for real.”

tyler almost choked, hiding his blushing face in josh’s shirt. he didn’t know what to do, his ears getting hot as he tried to think. for all he knew, this could be one of josh’s “jokes”, and the last thing he wanted was to be rejected.

“ty.” josh said, lightly shaking tyler’s shoulder from where his hand was on his back after not hearing a response, beginning to get insecure _fast._ “i’m serious.”

tyler swallowed, trying to make a decision. he felt like he was on one of those gameshows, that prompted you to think quickly on your feet or else you would lose the grand prize. josh was this grand prize, and if he didn’t think quickly, then he’d either lose it, or win it. never in his life would he ever think that josh, the kid who he’s grown to hate the absolute most, would even dream of dating him and being an actual couple. it was nuts.

but tyler decided that they would make this work.

“well, what are we waiting for?” tyler asked, his voice having a ring to it. josh watched as tyler scrambled on top of him, straddling his waist and placing his hands on his chest so that he wouldn’t fall. **(that boy wild)** “let’s go on a date right now.”

“sweetheart, it’s raining.” josh said, his hands on tyler’s soft hips to steady him.

tyler made a chicken noise, making josh laugh from how ridiculous he sounded.

he sighed, looking out the window and preparing himself. “fine, let’s go.”

tyler got off of josh’s grabbing his hand and pulling him out of bed, jogging down the stairs with him.

“where are we going?” josh asked, opening the door and leaving the house with tyler, instantly getting soaked.

“i don’t know!” tyler said through the rain.

“plaza?”

“plaza.” tyler said, rain getting into his eyes and flattening his hair down on his head.

josh couldn’t help but stare at tyler, and tyler knew it. he felt josh watching him, insecurity stuck to him like a shadow. as soon as the sky belched the loudest thunder, tyler ran with josh towards the plaza, swinging their hands back and forth as water gushed down their backs and soaked their pants. tyler giggled, josh laughing from the feeling of running through cold rain and holding tyler’s hand.

he thought of something.

“tyler.” josh stopped in his tracks, blinking a lot to keep the rain out of his eyes.

“yeah?” tyler asked, turning around to face josh.

josh pulled tyler closer to him, feeling his heart beating right out of his chest as he touched tyler’s nose with his own. tyler giggled, josh holding one of his dimpled cheeks in his hand, holding onto his other one. tyler shut his eyes when josh kissed him, water surrounding their lips and dripping off of their chins. josh’s hair was in his face, and tyler’s skin was sensitive to josh’s touch as the rain beat down on them. this one was _definitely_ different. it’s almost like it was a second nature, it was so easy to kiss each other now and it came like it was something they were _supposed_ to do, not forced to. it was probably because they were sworn enemies, and now tyler was seeing a side of josh that cared for someone, or that he liked being around.

maybe they were both changing.

tyler actually enjoyed himself this time, and if he could kiss josh in the rain again, he would.


	11. .bathrooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEYYY
> 
> sorry i've been inactive recently, i've been trying to study for my permit test 
> 
> even though i turned fifteen like six months ago but anyways
> 
> the updates will be getting more spacey, because i've written up to this chapter and i gotta write more! thank you guys for reading and leaving comments and stuff, that's sO FRIKIN NICE ILY GUYS
> 
> enjoy! :)
> 
> p.s. i hope you don't mind the lil author's notes that i write, sometimes i'll forget to write something or have a thought when i'm rereading and stuff and i gOTTA PUT IT IN

“what?!” brendon shouted into the air, throwing his head back, getting stares from almost everyone in the cafeteria.

“what?” tyler asked, his voice soft.

his cheeks were beginning to warm up at the thought of saturday, pressing his hands to his cheeks to stop brendon from seeing them. they got warmer the more he thought about gentle touches and soft kisses, fluffy yellow hair and squinty eyes. it was like they were in his bed again, being in complete silence with each other and josh holding him like he was made of glass.

“so, you’re actually dating now? is that what you’re telling me?” brendon asked, his eyebrows coming together and causing crinkles to fold in his forehead.

“y-yeah. i think.” tyler said, his heart feeling like it was about to melt through his ribcage the second he thought about josh again.

it was strange.

“don’t you two hate each other, though?” brendon asked, confused.

“no.” tyler shook his head. “i mean, we _did,_ but we had a good time that night. i think...i think this could work.”

“brendon, i think you’re overreacting. tyler’s fine. he’s smart.” patrick said, finishing his sprite.

“yeah. it’s just josh.” pete shrugged. “he tells me a lot about you.”

“he does?” tyler perked up, turning towards pete.

“yeah.” pete nodded. “he likes you. i think you should go for it.”

tyler squinted at pete, who made a face under his glare. that sounded suspicious, but tyler tried to think of it from a normal person’s view. if someone were talking about him like that, he’d be flattered as hell. but it’s josh, and he didn’t know what to think. tyler sighed, deciding to trust pete on it. they carried on their conversations, tyler chewing on his bottom lip and pulling out his phone when it vibrated in his pocket.

 **j:** _help i fell in the toilet_

tyler felt a tiny smile poke at the corners of his mouth, looking up slightly to see brendon still talking among patrick and pete.

 **t:** _what?_

 **j:** _i need help, no one is here right now_

 **t:** _how did you fall in the toilet_

 **j:** _help i’m gonna die_

 **j:** _tylerrrrrr_

 **t:** _aye_

 **t:** _okok i’m coming_

“i’ll be back, i need to pee.” tyler said, brendon nodding and going back to his conversations with pete and patrick. he never picked up on what they were talking about, probably him.

he walked through the hallways, almost empty except for the few groups scattered throughout. he shyly waved hi to a few people from his math class before slipping into the bathroom nearest to the back of the cafeteria.

“josh?” tyler whispered-shouted, the bathroom empty.

his eyebrows came together in confusion, scanning the closed bathroom stalls for him. the dim lights weren’t helping him any, especially the one at the end that wouldn’t stop flickering. he listened for the splashing of toilet water, or grunts of struggle, but the entire bathroom was silent.

“josh?”  he asked again, using his finger to gently push open the first stall.

nothing.

hearing his converse squeak on the floor, he made it to the second one.

nothing.

he gasped in shock when someone grabbed his hand, pulling him towards them from behind him. he was pressed against a jean jacket, the buttons poking at his shoulders, smelling old spice and coffee.

“hi, tyler!” josh said, hugging him.

“hi, josh.” tyler giggled, hiding his already red face in josh’s shoulder. “i thought you fell in?”

“i just said that because i wanted a hug!” josh said, like a child, making tyler’s stomach drown in butterflies as he snuggled into his hair. **(josh is real cuddly these days smh) (wAIT josh is also taller than tyler in this fic i stan tall!josh)**

“you couldn’t just come to lunch and do it?” tyler asked, holding onto josh’s waist.

“it’s better here.” josh shrugged. “more intimate.”

“in this smelly bathroom?” tyler smiled, picking his head up from josh’s shoulder and looking at him.

josh couldn’t help but return the gesture, softly kissing tyler’s lips. something about being in this bathroom and knowing someone could walk in at any minute added to the already risky atmosphere, and soon josh had tyler up against the wall, his cold fingertips slowly trailing up tyler’s warmed skin through the bottom of his shirt. tyler had his fingers tangled in josh’s hair, tugging slightly whenever josh’s mouth would move to a different spot on his neck, his cold fingers causing goosebumps to decorate his skin. **(hold on but have you seen his floof lately o my)**

“you’re gonna make me late to class.” tyler said between kisses, hearing the bell ring from outside the bathroom apart from heavy breaths and kisses.

“forget class. we should ditch.” josh suggested, slowly placing feather-light kisses from tyler’s mouth to his jaw, then to his neck.

“i c-can’t.” tyler said, making josh stop and look at him.

“you’re no fun.” josh pouted.

the door to the bathroom opened, josh quickly breaking away from tyler as soon as he heard its old hinges whine. his warmed face was even worse from embarrassment, looking at the door with wide eyes. he was okay when he saw it was only brendon and patrick, brendon raising his eyebrows when he saw them, tyler’s backpack in his hand.

“i thought you died or something. go to class, kid.” brendon said, handing tyler his backpack.

 he waved to josh, who smiled at him and waved to patrick as well before they left the bathroom. tyler bit the inside of his bottom lip out of habit, running his fingers through his messed up hair.

“so...ditch?” josh asked.

“study session later.” tyler said, looking back at him before leaving the bathroom.


	12. .jishwa!.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY IM BACK
> 
> ya girl's ready to take her permit test
> 
> but anyways, i have the ending planned out, and how i'm gonna write it and stuff, so nO MORE BREAKS LETS DO THIS
> 
> enjoy!

it’s been a month.

tyler was getting older today, and josh made sure he’d do something special for him. kelly had let him in with a pack of oreos and balloons to surprise tyler, but she didn’t think anything of it, just a cute little surprise from her son’s boyfriend. josh had gone into his bedroom after knocking and not hearing anything, seeing tyler sleeping, his nose underneath the covers.

awe, he looked cute.

josh smiled, cooing softly at tyler before quickly grabbing one of his mechanical pencils off of the desktop and shoving it into the balloon, a loud _pop!_ emanating throughout the room. tyler jumped in his sleep, shouting in surprise as he fell off of his bed, his covers sprawled on top of him.

“happy birthday, sweetheart!” josh exclaimed, smiling widely.

tyler groaned, rolling over slowly underneath his covers. his heart was in his throat, and he quickly covered his face once he looked out the window, the dull sunset feeling like lava pooling in his eyes. josh noticed tyler hadn’t gotten up after that, so he popped another balloon, tyler groaning again.

“even when we’re dating, you still have to be annoying.” tyler said.

“i wouldn’t be josh if i wasn’t.” josh made a face.

“why are you here so early?” tyler asked, his voice soggy with sleep.

“it’s almost sundown, baby boy.” josh said, tyler blushing at the nickname. “i’m taking you out. here, have an oreo.” josh said, opening the pack for him and handing him one, the filling looking extra white today.

tyler stuck his hand out from underneath the covers, josh placing an oreo on his palm and watching as he slipped it back underneath the blanket. after a few moments of silence, tyler gagged and coughed, his muffled sputtering the funniest thing in the world to josh. he got up, making a face when the covers fell off of him. he looked at the oreo, an overwhelming minty taste seeping down into his throat. he threw the oreo at josh, who couldn’t stop laughing, doubled-over.

“you’re the worst.” tyler said, going into the bathroom and rinsing his mouth out, beginning to brush his teeth with a normal amount of toothpaste.

“happy birthday!” josh shouted, like a child.

tyler stared at him through the window, his straight face instantly breaking when he saw him. his smile was enough to brighten up a whole planet, and even when he was being annoying, tyler found himself rolling his eyes, smiling and looking down at the sink.

“thank you, josh.”

“i wanna take you out. we need to go out.” josh said, more to himself than anything.

“why? it’s nothing special.” tyler shrugged.

he was just getting older, why celebrate?

“babe, you’re eighteen now. you’re an adult. we should go drinking.” josh said.

“that’s illegal.”

“skinny dipping!” josh shouted happily.

“illegal.”

“explore abandoned buildings?”

“illegal.”

“well, what should we do, _sister mary tyler?”_ josh asked.

tyler laughed at josh, spitting into the sink and rinsing his mouth out again.

“i don’t know. you’re full of surprises, aren’t you? surprise me.” tyler said, washing his face off from sleep.

josh smirked to himself; this was going perfectly.

he sat on tyler’s bed, checking his phone when he felt it vibrate, pete texting him.

**p:** _everything’s set up, you’re gonna get the little squirt here, right?_

**j:** _yeah, he thinks i don’t know where to take him later_

**P:** _alrighty_

he locked his phone, looking at tyler to make sure he wasn’t paying attention to him. tyler was just about to go into the shower part of his bathroom, shutting the door behind him. he sighed in content, glancing at the bean-bag chair tyler had in his room, to the lava lamp that still glowed in the sunlight. josh pulled his sleeves up, looking around tyler’s white-walled room. they were covered in mostly band posters, and little fairy lights lined the ceiling. he had polaroid pictures attached to the lights, mainly of him, brendon, and patrick. josh smiled softly at them, picturing tyler’s grin in his head and soon tyler was out of the shower, moving towards the closet to change and asking what josh was blushing about.

“i can’t say.” josh said, his cheeks warm.

“of course you can. what’s wrong?” tyler asked, slipping on a long sleeve, black, t-shirt. 

“it’s a secret.”

“do you want to tell me?” tyler asked, putting on a puffy jacket-vest over his shirt.

“come here.” josh whisper-shouted, watching as tyler gave him a look.

tyler went over to josh, sitting in the spot right next to him and looking at him. josh cupped his hand over his mouth and leaned into tyler’s ear, but instead of tyler hearing a really good secret like he was anticipating, josh only tackled him into the bed and planted kisses all over his face.

“s-stop!” tyler giggled, “that tickles! j-jish-wa!”

“jishwa?” josh stopped only to ask him that, a small smile playing at his mouth.

tyler blew out a tiny sigh of relief, looking at josh with flushed cheeks and messy hair. “who said that?”

“you said that.” josh smiled.

tyler blinked at josh, knowing that look on his face from seeing it so many times.

“don’t-!”

josh dove back to tyler’s face, peppering kisses on it again and making tyler giggle.

“jishwa!”


	13. .to tyler and josh.

josh had his hands over tyler’s eyes, tyler holding his arms out to make sure he didn’t bump into anything.

josh took him down to the sidewalk and across the street so it wasn’t _that_ obvious, following closely behind tyler and making their way towards his house. after many dismissed questions, tyler had stayed silent from the end of the sidewalk, wanting to ask where they were going again, but he knew josh wouldn’t tell him anything. he waved his arms a little bit when josh kept walking down the sidewalk, hoping he didn’t bump into anything in fear that he would die.

“whoa.” he said softly to himself when he almost tripped over a pebble.

“okay, baby boy.” josh took his hands off of tyler’s eyes, looking up at his house. “we’re here.”

“your house? what the heck?” tyler wondered why he walked so far to be back at josh’s house.

brendon ran out of the door and yelled a “surprise!”, a giant smile on his face. the few friends they had behind them were inside of the house and shouted the same thing. tyler gasped, covering his wide smile with his hands as they pooled around him in a hug. he laughed when patrick and brendon were the firsts to get to him, obnoxiously kissing his face and making kissy noises, shooing them away.

“get inside, we have food.” brendon said, following patrick and pete into the house and waving at tyler. “happy birthday, ty!”

tyler waved back to him, his heart swollen. if anything, he could cry. sure, he saw his friends every day, but the fact that this was set up just for his birthday?

wow.

“happy birthday, tyler.” josh smiled sweetly, holding his hand out for tyler to take.

tyler did, josh leading him into the house, in which their friends were talking amongst themselves while soft music played in the background. in fact, when tyler was really listening to it, he heard josh’s voice as it played.

“is this your mixtape?” tyler asked, josh looking up at the ceiling in mock-thought at the question.

“maybe.”

tyler smiled, looking down at the floor when a pink hue dusted his cheeks, glancing back up at their friends. birthday decorations were set up in the living room and kitchen, balloons and confetti littering the countertops. there even was a cake and everything. never in his life did he think anyone, _especially_ josh, would go out of their way to do this for him.

he was sweet.

“josh?” tyler asked, turning to face him, holding his other hand and swinging them lightly in between them. “thank you.”

josh smiled softly at tyler, warmed. tyler stood up on his tippy-toes, pressing a soft kiss to his lips, just out of gratitude and appreciation. instead of pulling back when tyler did, though, josh followed tyler’s mouth to try and get another kiss, making tyler smile against him. maybe it was because of the butterflies he’d get swarming in his tummy whenever josh did things like that, or the fact he was actually dating his worst enemy, and he still couldn’t believe it.

“ew!” brendon shouted, making tyler groan and hide his face in josh’s shirt, josh flicking brendon off and causing him to laugh.

“i’d like to make a toast!” pete said, standing on josh’s counter with a literal piece of toast in his hand, making their friends stop talking to look up at him. “to tyler becoming an adult, and for making my best friend less douchey.”

“yeah!” patrick shouted, “to tyler and josh!”


	14. .no new friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY GUYS IM SORRY I LITERALLY SAID NO BREAKS
> 
> THEN I DECIDED TO PLAY A VIDEO GAME AND THEN IT CRASHED
> 
> my computer was down for like two days but i got it fixed, so i'll keep posting! 
> 
> enjoy!

tyler was sat at the table, talking amongst his friends and waiting for josh to join them. he hadn’t sat with them yesterday, but tyler brushed it off. josh was a person, he was probably busy.

it was only when there was ten minutes until lunch ended that tyler had stopped talking, feeling weary. he hadn’t shown up again today, and worry was rising up in the back of tyler’s mind. was he okay?

“where’s your man?” brendon asked, seeing josh wasn’t here for a second time.

“i don’t know. he wasn’t here yesterday, either.” tyler pouted.

“is he dead?”

“maybe.” tyler said, biting his bottom lip out of habit and looking around the cafeteria.

his eyes flicked over to the door in curiosity when it opened, seeing josh walking in with someone by his side. tyler had never seen him before, but then again, he’d never met josh’s friends. josh didn’t look in his direction, instead, his gaze was trained to the floor as the person next to him kept talking, a small smile on his face as he listened. tyler was still trying to figure out who josh was talking to, but he stopped staring when josh sat down in an empty spot at the table in the corner of the cafeteria, where he had sat before.

“ew, he’s at the fuckin’... _popular kids’_ table. since when is josh popular?” brendon asked, looking back at josh.

“why isn’t he sitting with us” pete was next, his focus on josh completely disregarding their table.

“he didn’t tell you anything?” patrick asked pete, who shook his head and looked back at josh again.

he seemed to be having fun with them. tyler was confused; sure, josh had other friends, and of course, he could sit with them if he wanted to, but sometimes when josh was busy during lunch, he’d at least drop a text to tell them he wasn’t going to be at the table that day. it wasn’t a big deal, but when someone leaves a group, it’s kind of weird. tyler studied the table, trying to figure out who these people were, but came up short repeatedly, and soon he was carried into a conversation with brendon and pete while patrick and dallon were on their own thing. he couldn’t focus too much on what brendon was saying though, still wondering why josh had sat at that table today. he didn’t want to be too curious, though.

tyler decided to drop it; josh had other friends, it’s fine.

..........

tyler looked out the window to josh’s house that night, his blinds shut.

he barely talked to him today. tyler was beginning to worry; was josh alright? it wasn’t like him to just not talk, if anything he would at least drop by or wave at tyler through the window before he went to sleep. he pulled out his phone after a moment, typing in josh’s contact.

**t:** _hey, josh_

**t:** _is everything alright?_

**j:** _yeah, i’m ok_

**j:** _are you?_

**t:** _i’m fine_

**t:** _how come you didn’t sit w us today? we missed you_

**j:** _i met some new friends today, and i wanted to sit w them. that’s not a problem, is it?_

tyler made a face at that.

**t:** _ofc not, i was just asking is all_

tyler watched as his typing bubbles lingered for a few seconds before disappearing, squinting his eyes in thought as he looked at the conversation. he was beginning to think he may have come off too strong, or said something to upset the guy. his bit the inside of his bottom lip, locking his phone and thinking.

maybe he was being too curious.


	15. .baby boy.

tyler was sat at a josh-less table again today, resting his head on his hand and thinking.

tyler had never thought this much in his life. sure, he thought about brendon’s feelings and how pete and patrick were doing everyday, but he didn’t think about them _this_ much. he was worrying, mainly because josh hadn’t texted him since that day, and he hadn’t gotten a chance to talk to him.

was it something he did wrong?

he would discreetly watch the corner table from the back of the cafeteria, seeing josh laughing and talking with who he assumed were new friends. he felt stupid; tyler tried to just tell himself that they were just new friends, and he shouldn’t be worried like this, but he was mostly consumed in something that he did. he probably did something wrong.

“ty? what are you thinking about?” brendon asked, seeing him zoned out with his head in his hands.

“is josh okay?” tyler asked.

“didn’t you ask him? what did he say?”

“he said he made new friends, but...i think he might’ve gotten mad at me.” tyler pouted, looking at the table.

“mad for what?”

tyler shrugged. “i don’t know.”

“i’ll talk to him for you.” pete said, getting up from the table.

“no, don’t.”

“it’s fine.” pete shook his head, going across the cafeteria to josh’s table.

josh smiled upon seeing pete, the one where his eyes would light up and his cheeks would form creases. pete returned the gesture, waving his hand towards himself. josh got up from the table, flicking his eyes to tyler quickly before focusing on pete. tyler could barely make out his words, but he had a clue of what he was asking. he didn’t know what josh was saying, but he walked away from pete after he nodded, sitting down at the table again.

pete came back to the table, sitting down between brendon and pete again.

“he says to meet him in the bathroom. like, now.” he told tyler, making a face.

when tyler looked up in josh’s direction, he was gone, the cafeteria door just closing. tyler blew out a breath, his heart beginning to beat in his ears again, getting up from the table and taking the long route to the bathroom. he was starting to get nervous, yet he’d been with josh for almost two months now. this should be normal for him, but it still felt like the first time they went on an actual date, or the first time they touched each other without annoying intentions. he walked into the bathroom, seeing josh leaning against the wall, waiting for him.

“ty!” josh greeted, tyler staring at him and crossing his arms over his chest.

“what’s going on?” he asked him, josh taking one of his hands in his.

“i’m sorry. my phone is dead, i haven’t been able to text, or call. don’t think i’m mad at you or something.” josh said, his eyebrows coming together, flicking his hazel eyes back and forth between tyler’s own.

tyler took his lip in between his teeth in thought, finally nodding, his gaze trained to the floor. josh let go of his hand and hugged him tightly. tyler wrapped his arms around his waist, closing his eyes and melting into the hug. he hadn’t gotten one of these in, like...ever. he missed them.

josh kissed tyler’s forehead, enjoying having tyler in his arms like this. he’s met some people, who a lot of people knew. apparently, they threw the best parties and had the best personalities, and josh was only wearing his rolling stones t-shirt when they came up to talk to him about it. he couldn’t let an opportunity to meet new friends slip. sure, he was talking to them a lot more and hanging out with them tons, but he still didn’t forget about tyler.

he liked tyler.

“go on a date with me tonight.” josh said suddenly, his voice soft as he looked down at tyler.

“tonight?” tyler repeated, josh nodding. “okay. where to?”

“it’ll be a surprise.” josh said, smiling widely.

tyler couldn’t help but return the gesture, noticing how josh’s eyes began studying him. josh couldn’t help but stare, noticing how his eyebrows were shaped, or how pouty his lips actually were. tyler blushed under his gaze, josh leaning down to kiss him, his hands trailing from around tyler’s shoulders to his neck, holding him still. tyler curled his fingers in the material of josh’s shirt, shutting his eyes and kissing josh back, shifting his head slightly to get a more comfortable angle. tyler felt like his chest would explode; they’d done this a hundred time before, tyler somehow still getting nervous and hoping he didn’t mess anything up.

josh was the one to pull back first, remembering that he needed to get back to his new friends.

“i’ll see you tonight, baby boy.” josh said, backing up from tyler to leave, shooting him a small smile.

once he left, tyler held his hands to his hot face, wondering who gave josh the right to make him blush this much.


	16. .notes.

josh ended up taking tyler to a picnic in the park that night, and to both of their surprise, there was a lantern festival taking place.

tyler found it heartwarming when he and josh released their own lanterns, watching them disappear into the night sky along with the many others that belonged to different people. it was nice, being in josh’s arms and staring up at the lit sky; it was as if there was nothing to worry about in that moment, and it was just the two of them.

now, they were at school, and again, josh had sat with other people during lunch. tyler sighed, looking over at that table for the third time in two minutes, turning his attention back to brendon.

“does he hate me? am i being clingy?” tyler asked, worried.

“no, that’s normal. he’s just...trying to make new friends. be proud.” brendon tried, but in all honesty, it was weird not having josh here to make fun of tyler or tease him like he normally did.

he’s been gone from their table for weeks.

tyler eventually sighed, getting up when the bell rang for them to go to their next classes. he slipped his backpack over his shoulder, waving a goodbye to his friends before making his way to his locker, again, having no one to walk with. his thoughts were lost in the sea of loud voices echoing throughout the hallway, people shoving through each other to get to where the needed to be. he found his locker, opening it and half expecting rotten eggs to be inside of it, but instead, all that fell out were...notes.

tyler made a face, a tiny blush taking to his cheeks before he looked around for someone to be laughing at him, just to embarrass him, but everyone was just walking along, giving him looks as to why he had a mountain of notes stuffed into his locker. he bent down, picking one up before unfolding it, reading it.

_hey, baby boy. have a good day today._

he smiled to himself, reading another one.

_you make me the happiest guy alive. keep smiling for me._

another one.

_i like you a lot. a lot, a lot._

he shook his head with a smile; josh was so cheesy, but he appreciated the gesture nonetheless. it was nice, actually dating him. josh had always made tyler feel loved and wanted, when just months ago they hated each other. tyler picked up the notes as best as he could, stuffing them into his half empty backpack and carrying his textbook instead, deciding to keep these.

just in case.


	17. .joke's on you!.

josh had changed.

tyler hadn’t thought much of it, but if he was being honest, josh really did change. just the other day, during a date that tyler had set up for josh, josh had to leave early, because one of his friends were in an emergency. tyler hadn’t minded, because he probably would’ve done the same thing, but still, when josh left his house he felt weird. he was at the table now, the same worried feeling congesting him, yet something was different.

he felt off.

he pulled his phone out, his heart beating fast as he stared at his phone screen. he pressed josh’s contact and typed a message, and this time he was actually reluctant to press send. he sighed, pressing it anyways.

 **t:** _josh is everything ok?_

tyler glanced at the table, watching as josh had pulled his phone out of his pocket. tyler saw that josh’s typing bubbles appeared again, his hopes raising a little bit, but they quickly plummeted once they disappeared without a message back. tyler had locked his phone, sighing and resting his chin in his hands. he stared at his black phone screen, pressing the home button just in case, but still.

nothing.

“ty, what’s the matter? is it josh?” brendon asked, hearing tyler sigh.

he knew that it was, but he still had to ask. tyler only nodded in return, brendon looking to pete hopefully. pete only shook his head.

“he hadn’t talked to me at all about it.”

“maybe he’d talk to you?” patrick suggested, really not knowing what was going on.

they all just assumed josh was talking to new people, and tyler just assumed he was being too clingy, considering they went on dates often and hung out with each other at home after school.

well, maybe until recently.

tyler sighed, deciding he would ask josh in person. he had so many thoughts swarming in his head, asking himself if he really should ask, or if he was just being paranoid. even thoughts of this whole thing still being a joke took jabs at him, but if that were the case, they couldn’t pretend for this long.

right?

tyler got up slowly, focusing on josh, who had been laughing with his new friends and talking amongst them. tyler had no idea who these people were, but he gained as much little courage as he could muster and forced himself to walk over there, accidentally making eye contact with one of josh’s friends. he smiled at tyler, before turning his attention back to josh and gestured. josh stopped his conversation and turned around, looking up at tyler from his seat.

“h-hey. is something wrong?” tyler asked lowly, knowing that his friends were watching them talk, and _fuck,_ he wanted to leave this area.

josh swallowed, glancing at one of his friends. “no. i’m fine.” he told him.

“are you sure? we haven’t talked in like, three days.” tyler said softly, looking down at his sleeves.

they were suddenly too high, so he pulled them down to his wrists to try and hide his insecurity as best as he could, his ears hot as he tried not to say something stupid in front of josh’s friends.

“...so?” josh asked, making a face.

tyler raised his eyebrows, trying to think.

did he just say that to him?

“so...we’re dating? we’re supposed to talk every day, to make sure things are fine.” tyler said, confused.

“dude, i have no idea what you’re talking about.” josh said, his voice weary.

“what are you saying?”

“that _thing_ that you were talking about? it must have been a joke, i don’t remember saying anything about that.”

“are you fucking kidding me?” tyler’s heart began to pound, embarrassment and hurt taking over him at the same time, and he became overwhelmed.

a _joke._

there was a lump in his throat that he couldn’t swallow down, and his chest started aching. he was confused, josh’s words feeling like a slap in the face. josh, on the other hand, knew the more he spoke, the more the screwed things up, but he just met these guys and he didn’t know if this would change what they thought of him. he really hated himself for saying this, but maybe if he explained to tyler, he would understand.

he had to.

“mmm, n-no. i don’t know what you’re talking about.” josh said, an unreadable expression on his face.

tyler’s eyes glossed over, and tried to find a sign that josh was just being an extreme jerk today, that he didn’t even mean what he said.  tyler _literally_ felt his heart break, like someone was stepping on his chest with a heavy work boot. tyler wanted to scream, but he didn’t. instead, josh’s head snapped to the wall next to their table, his jaw aching with the metallic taste of blood in his mouth. he never knew tyler punched so hard. when he looked back at him, he was already gone, the cafeteria door just now closing. josh sighed, his stomach plummeting when he realized what he had said. he looked over to the table across the cafeteria, brendon shaking his head at josh and grabbing tyler’s backpack, rushing out of the cafeteria after him. he sighed, holding his jaw. he was shaking slightly, pulling out his phone when he felt it vibrate.

 **P:** _you fucked up so bad. meet me outside for a sec?_

“what was that all about?” one of them, will, asked.

“i...i don’t know. he’s strange.” josh lied, feeling like crying and getting out of here, but he couldn’t.

“was he actually your boyfriend?” riley asked, her tone soft.

josh sighed heavily again, hiding his face in his hands.

“n-no. i have no idea who that is.”

“what is he like...obsessed with you or something? that’s weird.”

“i know. i keep...trying to get rid of him, you know?”

“yeah. we could help you, you know?”

“no, it’s fine. thanks." josh only shrugged, deteriorating on himself the more his group talked to him about it.

he couldn’t believe himself. he got up slowly, shaken up, grabbing his backpack and going outside to meet pete. pete was waiting by the far end of the wall, making eye contact with josh. josh walked over, everyone in the cafeteria already pooling out and clearing the area quickly. pete walked up to him, and in an instant, he received a punch across the face again and was pushed up against the wall, pete’s fists in his collar as blood trickled out of his nose, his vision blurry.

“i’m only going to say this once. the next time you do something like that to somebody, i’ll do more than just punch you. that was fucked, and you know it. check your ego before you talk to me, or any of us again.” pete said in josh’s face, letting go of his collar and walking away.

josh really did feel like crying. he was an idiot for thinking that would be in any way an okay thing to do. he lost someone who he actually began to really fall for, yet he shot it away just because he was scared of his friends caring about it.

pete was right, and so was everyone else, and soon he was sliding down the wall, feeling defeat and sadness and _hatred_ for himself, all because he cared what people think.


	18. .fireplace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i know you're gonna hate me
> 
> but i haven't been posting a lot because i have band camp now, till next week thursday. i'm still writing, but i'm out most of the day away from my computer. i know you're probably like,
> 
> mandi
> 
> ain't nobody care
> 
> bUT i feel like i should give you an update, just in case! i'll still write and try to update, but it will be kinda hard, i'm sorry
> 
> ILL TRY MY BEST THOUGH
> 
> thank you guys for still reading and commenting and stuff, it really means a lot that you take your time to read this though i'm not very good with the updates 
> 
> like you guys are so flippin nice what the heck
> 
> anyways, enjoy!

tyler hadn’t stopped crying, not even when he opened the gate of his school and left.

he left everyone and everything behind, trying to calm himself down. he was _so fucking embarrassed,_ and devastated that he let that happen to himself. he really should have known. they’d been enemies for years, and then when the opportunity arose for josh to pull another joke on him, he did it.

biggest prank of the year, huh?

he began to cry again, stopping his steps on the sidewalk and feeling himself fall apart as he hid his face in his hands. tears seeped out between the slots of his fingers, muffled sobs the only sound throughout his neighborhood. he was close to home, yet he couldn’t seem to make it that far. it was like he had been living in a really nice house that he built, all by himself, but suddenly, an avalanche broke it down, destroying everything he’d been working for. he was underneath that avalanche, heavy on his chest and suffocating him, getting inside of his head and hurting his heart.

josh was the snow. **(queen of weird ass metaphors im sorry ok thats how i would assume it feels)**

tyler didn’t know what time it was, but when he looked up through cloudy vision to see who had stopped their car in front of him and was running towards him, he assumed school was out. brendon met him on the sidewalk, engulfing him in a tight hug, tyler beginning to cry again into his shoulder. brendon didn’t know how tyler was feeling, mainly because this happened when he knew it would, yet everyone still pushed him to try it out. he felt guilty, if he was being honest. he made sure to hold tyler until he stopped crying, even when the sun began to beat down on them even hotter. he was sweating in the heat, but he still held tyler close, waiting until his sniffles stopped and he was breathing regularly again.

“do i still have you on that ice cream deal?” brendon pulled back, holding tyler’s puffy cheeks in his hands and looking at him.

“...o-okay.” tyler said, looking at the floor.

brendon took tyler’s hand and picked up his backpack for him, leading him to his car to take him back to his house. tyler felt like a baby, but to say the least, this hurt. he rested his face on his hand, staring out the window with reddened eyes and trying not to think so hard.

the rest of the car ride was silent.

..........

brendon and tyler were on the couch in the dark living room, the only sound in the room being tyler’s dying sniffles and spongebob’s voice playing lowly, the other source of light was the fireplace.

tyler was curled against brendon, who had his arms wrapped securely around tyler, trying to make him feel better. he thought to ask if he wanted other people here with him, to maybe get his mind off of things, but he knew tyler didn’t like seeing him this vulnerable, and brendon was more than enough. tyler hadn’t spoken since the car ride, and brendon felt sick. it was scary, having your normally talkative best friend stay quiet like this. he didn’t know how tyler felt, and frankly, neither did tyler.

he felt like there was an empty void in his stomach, somehow making him full and not touch the ice cream brendon had given to him, sitting on the table beside the two.

tyler had his eyes closed, all of this really wearing him out. he’s never cried this much before, especially over a boy, but this was awful. his chest had finally gone down to rhythmic rising and falling instead of the sporadic movements of him crying again, brendon assuming that tyler had fallen asleep. brendon was uncomfortable, mainly because he’d been sat here for over an hour and his bum was beginning to hurt, and tyler was on one of his arms and it began to grow numb, but if being here like this made tyler stop crying and alright for the time being, he’d wait until his arm turned purple.

tyler’s phone vibrated softly on the table next to him, pulling brendon from his own thoughts as he curiously flicked his eyes over to see who it was. josh’s contact flashed over the screen, along with the many, _many_ text messages he’s sent over the last hour. there were about five missed calls from him and over twenty texts, and brendon could feel his blood boil. josh really thought, after doing all of that, a text could just make it all go away.

he sighed.

“ty, do you want to go out?” brendon asked softly, tyler’s heart hurting.

“no.” tyler said, his voice hoarse.

“do you wanna do anything?”

tyler only shook his head, brendon biting the inside of his lip out of nerves. tyler really just wanted to sleep, or just sit in silence. he knew brendon was trying, though, and he felt a bit better knowing that he was there for him. brendon pursed his lips together, coming up short when he tried to think of ways to get tyler up, and he kissed the top of his head instead before turning up the television. he couldn’t even cheer himself up either. he knew this wasn’t about him, but _fuck,_ he felt awful. his best friend was practically dead, and his sadness infected the room like the flu.

the doorbell rang shortly after the commercial break started, brendon moving underneath tyler to go get it. tyler sat up on the couch, hunched over and staring at the tv screen, his head in his hands and his puffy eyes tired. brendon opened the door, seeing pete and patrick standing on the other side, dallon poking his head in from behind them and waving.

“hey, we brought these for tyler.” pete said, going up to brendon and giving him a giant teddy bear, almost half the length of him.

patrick handed over a box of chocolates and what looked like a blanket. “i know he’s not a baby, but...” patrick shrugged.

dallon had a small golden retriever in his hands. “i brought my puppy.” he smiled.

“thanks, guys. i’m sure he’ll appreciate this. i don’t think he wants too many people around right now, though.” brendon said, looking back at him.

“n-no, it’s fine.” tyler called, sniffling again and holding onto his head that was beginning to pound.

they walked past brendon and stood at the doorway, unsure of whether tyler wanted to actually see them or not. tyler noticed this, rolling his eyes playfully and standing up, holding his arms out. dallon set his puppy on the ground and rushed over to tyler with the rest of them, engulfing him in a hug and smiling as they managed to coax a giggle from him.

“ty, we missed you!” pete said into tyler’s neck, hugging him.

“yeah, you weren’t in sixth.” patrick added, giving tyler a messy kiss on his cheek just to be annoying.

“i left school.” tyler shrugged sullenly, squished in the middle of them.

he appreciated these guys so much; all they did was hug him and he felt a million times better to know that they cared about him. especially pete and dallon; they were new friends, yet they treated him like he was an old one. he liked them a lot.

“we need to do something.” patrick said suddenly, looking past tyler’s head in thought.

“like what?” brendon asked, setting down their gifts next to tyler and furrowing his eyebrows.

dallon’s puppy had jumped into tyler’s lap, his tail still wagging as tyler played with it, gently biting his fingers and yapping at him.

“you have a fireplace.” patrick pursed his lips.

tyler looked up quickly. “i have notes from josh. i-in my...in my backpack.” he said softly, not looking up from the puppy.

“perfect.” pete got tyler’s backpack and opened it, overstuffed with crumpled notes from josh.

he opened one, reading it. see, now he felt sad. he knew josh really, really liked tyler, yet he managed to fuck it up in less than ten minutes. pete could tell he was about to fall stupid in love from these little notes he’d written, sighing to himself.

“do you want to?” pete asked tyler, who made a face.

“let me just keep one. i haven’t read all of them.” tyler shrugged, getting up and digging through them, picking one out and placing it in his pocket.

maybe he wanted it as a terrible reminder, something to make him extra sad again. he didn’t know why he wanted to keep just one, but he did anyways. he took to the bottom of his backpack and turned it upside down against brendon’s fireplace, watching as the crumpled notes fell into the fire, crackling and burning up. tyler emptied the entire backpack, tossing it to the side and watching as the mountain of notes slowly got smaller and smaller, the fire overtaking them. the orange flames danced against tyler’s eyes as he chewed on the inside of his lip, watching everything burn.

he watched as his anger had burned, the sadness that he was stuck in melting away. all the kisses and hugs, feelings and memories, they were crackling away in brendon’s fireplace.

tyler didn’t even know he was crying until brendon wrapped an arm around him, wiping away hot tears that slid down his cheeks and leaning on his shoulder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> are you liking the plot and stuff so far? 
> 
> it's not too far fetched/cheesy/or whatever? i know it's fanfiction and honestly not a big deal, but i just want to make sure that it's worth the read, you get me? 
> 
> let me know what you think so that i could improve my writing! 
> 
> thank you!
> 
> -love, mandi


	19. .basketball.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOOO HERE WE GO
> 
> enjoy!

tyler woke up, groggy and tired.

he’d been in his bed all weekend, despite his mom and friends trying to get him up. his mom didn’t know what was going on with him, mainly because whenever she tried to ask him, he’d shrug or change the topic. it made her sad, seeing her normally happy kid like this. she tried not to hover him too much, knowing that he liked to be alone whenever he was upset, but she couldn’t help popping in whenever she’d pass his door or remember to.

“tyler, do you need anything?” she asked, poking her head in. “you have school today.”

tyler only shook his head, silently getting out of bed and going into his bathroom.

“do you want me to drop you to school?”

tyler was about to shake his head again, but then he remembered that he usually walked to school with josh every day. he’d probably be waiting for him or leave the same time he did, and he really didn’t want to go through that. he muttered a tiny “yes, please” at her, before she nodded and went into the kitchen to make tyler something.

he would sometimes just grab whatever from the kitchen before he left, but kelly decided not today.

tyler, on the other hand, shut his blinds as soon as he woke up, and it wasn’t long before he heard someone ring the doorbell downstairs. he listened as he brushed his teeth, slowly stopping his movements when he heard his mother.

“josh? long time no see! how are you?”

tyler’s eyes blew wide, scrambling over to his door and shutting it quickly, locking it. he felt his throat close up and his heart begin to pound, feeling sick. he closed his bathroom door, locking that as well and continued to brush his teeth. he tried to finish as quickly as he could, but the more he thought about the one his mom was talking to at the door, the more he felt his chest cave him and his eyes burn with tears. he rinsed his mouth out, his eyes stinging the _more he thought._

tyler was late to school that day.

..........

tyler hadn’t spoken to anyone all day.

whenever they’d ask, he’d tell him his pet died, that way they’d tell him that they were sorry for him.

he was sorry for himself, too. he was sorry that he let himself get set up in a trap, he was sorry that he made himself cry so much when he overthought and he was sorry that he liked josh. he felt like a baby, his friends doing their best to make sure he was alright. he really did love them, even when he forced himself to talk when he really just wanted to be alone.

maybe read a good book or something, anything to just keep his mind off of things.

“tyler, why did you walk around in a hoodie all day?” brendon asked, seeing tyler sit with them a few minutes after the lunch bell rang.

tyler only shrugged, his pouty lips pulled in a thin line. brendon sighed, his mouth turning into a tiny frown. he could tell tyler had cried more than once throughout the day by his wet bottom lashes, and the color his cheeks were. he scooted over to be directly in front of him, pushing away his hoodie. tyler didn’t shoo his hand away, he was too tired.

brendon tsked.

“hey, ty. how are you?” patrick asked, walking over towards their table with pete and sitting in josh’s old spot.

tyler shrugged, resting his head on his hands. patrick side hugged him, bringing up a conversation with brendon and pete, knowing tyler wouldn’t talk. something about an exam tomorrow that tyler had no intention of studying for or passing. he was tired, wanting nothing more than to sleep this away.

his eyes flicked over to the cafeteria entrance as soon as it opened, seeing josh walk in with one of his stupid friends. he was smiling, yet it wasn’t genuine. it looked like someone had glued it onto his face – his eyes weren’t even squinting. tyler watched, his stomach sinking, as he made eye contact with him, his smile fading. he stopped in his tracks, his friend going towards the table without him. his hair was a lot messier than normal, the yellow fading out into a blonde. he had a little butterfly bandaid over his nose, and tyler could see the stubble growing in around his mouth.

if he was being honest, he didn’t look so great.

tyler felt his eyes begin to water as thoughts came rushing back to him the more he looked at josh’s hazel eyes, or the nose ring that shone in these bright lights. the lump had come back, and it was like time had stopped. they were just _looking_ at each other and tyler was breaking down, slower and slower the more he blinked.

“ty? did you hear me?” brendon asked, snapping him out of his thoughts and making him turn his head.

“what?” his voice cracked.

“i asked if you were going to go to pete’s basketball game tonight?”

tyler shook his head again, breathing out through his nose and trying to swallow the lump in his throat.

“wait, you play basketball?” tyler asked softly.

“yeah, i talk about it all the time. i made the team.”

“when?”

“all last week.” pete said.

he and josh stopped talking around last tuesday. it was thursday now.

“i’m sorry. i-i guess i didn’t listen. yeah, i’ll come to see you.” tyler nodded, staring at the table and trying to clear his thoughts away with seeing pete tonight.

pete nodded, carrying back into the conversation with brendon, leaving tyler to think to himself.

..........

tyler was weary, but he walked into the big gymnasium with brendon and patrick, handing their ticket to the guy next to the stands and finding a seat on the other side of the gym.

he wordlessly sat down, a tiny tinge of excitement coursing through him at the thought of watching basketball players try to get the ball into the hoop. he actually did like basketball games, so he didn’t mind being here instead of home. the game started shortly, and soon he found himself smiling softly and watching pete run across the court, dribbling the ball in his hand.

brendon and patrick stood up when he scored two points, tyler clapping for him.

“he’s good, huh?” brendon asked tyler, who nodded and smiled.

“i wish i would have known when he told us. i was too busy being sad.” tyler frowned, feeling bad.

“that’s okay, ty. you’re here now. enjoy yourself, and support our new friend.” brendon said, patting tyler’s knee.

the thing is, tyler did try to enjoy himself, and he was doing a pretty good job for his first time in a week. he kind of messed up a bit when he saw the one person who he really wished would have stayed home tonight, yet he was there, cheering with his new friends and not even noticing tyler.

“brendon.” tyler called, his voice getting drowned out in the sea of voices.

“yeah?” brendon asked through the cheers after tyler tapped his shoulder.

“i see josh.” tyler said, his eyebrows coming together.

brendon looked down into the crowd, seeing the yellow hair that is josh and frowning.

“it’s okay. don’t study him. pete.” brendon pointed, just in time for tyler to look up when he scored a three.

“hey, is everything okay?” patrick asked once the game was quieter, noticing tyler’s worried look.

“josh is here.” tyler shrugged, deciding not to make it into a big deal.

he was just here, like half of the entire school was. he was best friends with pete, after all. tyler sighed, resting his head in his hands.

he didn’t cheer this time when pete scored again.

..........

tyler went with brendon and patrick to go get snacks from the little booth they had outside the doors.

that area was packed, overfilled with kids trying to buy snacks and water. his ears were ringing a bit, the screams of passionate teenagers still echoing in them. he bought a cookie from the booth, handing the lady a dollar and getting one in return. they couldn’t eat in the gym, and they had a few minutes left, so brendon and patrick waited with tyler outside to eat his cookie.

“pete’s doing really good.” tyler said, proud of him and taking a bite of his cookie.

he managed to score twenty-six points all by himself through the first half of the game, which was great.

“he is.” patrick smiled softly, drinking his soda.

“i wonder if...” tyler trailed off when brendon’s face fell, looking behind tyler’s shoulder.

patrick’s eyebrows raised as he sipped his sprite, turning away from whoever was behind tyler. tyler followed their gazes, immediately wishing he’d have just walked back into the gym. josh was standing there, shifting his weight from one foot to the next in nerves. he hadn’t talked to tyler in week, trying to text him and call him. he tried to apologize, even though this really couldn’t be fixed, but he still tried.

“ty-”

tyler shook his head, looking to the floor and turning back around. he really didn’t want to do this, and he could feel his cheeks begin to get warm and his heart start hurting again. the buzzer rang for the game to start up.

“can i please talk to you? please?” josh asked, fidgeting with his fingers.

tyler bit the inside of his bottom lip out of habit, knowing josh only did that when he was almost too nervous. he knew that he probably felt like throwing up on top of that. tyler wondered if he really did have that impact on josh, or he was just doing that to make him think so.

“no.” brendon said. “we need to go.”

“it’s...it’s fine. save my seat.” tyler said, looking at him.

“that’s not happening.”

“brendon.” tyler’s voice was soft.

brendon looked at tyler, hard, before sighing through his nose. he nodded, walking away with patrick back inside the gym. tyler watched them leave, before looking back at josh again.

“tyler, i’m sorry.” josh said, tyler seeing his eyes glass over in the dim lights of the streetlamps.

“i don’t care.” tyler shook his head again. “is that all?”

“tyler, _please_ listen to me. i’m sorry.” josh said again, his voice cracking. “i was stupid for thinking that was okay. i don’t know why i said that. i _miss_ you.”

tyler trained his gaze somewhere else, josh’s words piercing through his heart like a needle in fine cloth. he missed josh, too, if he was being honest, but he didn’t need to know that. this was josh’s fault, and tyler didn’t think that any apology would fix that.

“you embarrassed me in front of people just to keep whatever reputation you had. we broke up because of you.” tyler said, crossing his arms tighter around himself.

“i know, and i feel awful. i...i shouldn’t have said that. tyler, i liked you a lot, and i still do.”

“do you? because you didn’t seem to in front of your friends.” tyler said.

“i need my friends, too. can you give me a second chance? please? i promise i’ll make it up to you.” josh pleaded. “i’m sorry.”

“i-i have to go.” tyler said, beginning to walk away from josh, but he quickly grabbed his wrist and pulled him to him.

tyler found himself against josh’s forehead, their noses barely touching as he looked at his bloodshot eyes. they were hazel, now they just looked brown. tyler shut his eyes, sighing through his nose as the feelings he tried so hard to push down were now rushing back to him, and he was overwhelmed again. he felt tears pool at his eyes, burning.

“please?” josh asked again, his voice weak and breathy.

tyler really wanted to give in, but he was scared, to say the least. he was scared of it being another joke. he was scared of josh’s friends. he was scared of being rejected again.

he was scared of being at the edge of _that_ cliff, and he was scared of falling off.

he wouldn’t let that happen for a second time.

tyler pulled back, pushing josh away lightly before walking back into the gym, leaving josh standing in the middle of the walkway and watching him leave. tyler hung his head when he heard josh sniffle behind him, handing the guy his other half of the ticket and sitting with brendon again in silence.

..........

“what did he say?” brendon asked, once tyler got in the car and put his seatbelt on.

“he said sorry.” tyler shrugged.

“and?”

tyler only shrugged again, earning a sigh from brendon.

“does he want to get back together?” patrick asked from the backseat, popping his head in between them.

tyler nodded, looking down at his fingers and playing with them.

“did you agree? don’t tell me you agreed. matter of fact, if you agreed, i’m dropping you off at the park so you have to walk.” brendon said.

“i didn’t agree. i feel like...an asshole.” tyler said, looking out the window at the dark blurs of trees and cars passing by.

“no, you’re not. he can’t just apologize for something like that. people are already talking about how you were obsessed with him and stuff.”

“wait, _what?”_ tyler asked, his stomach churning like currents.

“i heard a few people talking about it still. they think you were following josh around and made up that you two were dating. i think his friends might have started it. i tried to put a stop to it, but you know. _popular people.”_ brendon shook his head, turning down tyler’s street.

“brendon, i’m going to die. i can’t show my face. my life is over.” tyler said, his voice quivering.

“me and patty will make sure nothing happens to you. we will fix this, babe. don’t worry. take a nap when you get home. call me if you need more ice cream.” brendon said sternly, pulling in front of tyler’s house.

tyler waved to them and went into his house, feeling extremely sick and sad again. he rushed up the stairs, closing his door and locking it. he collapsed onto his bed, covering his face with a pillow and screaming into it. he screamed out instead of crying some more. he screamed because he couldn’t stop hurting. he screamed because josh ruined his life and he hated him, but at the same time, his old feelings never went away. he screamed because he was stressed, and he wanted to leave. he screamed until his face was red and his throat was throbbing, and until he couldn’t stand up because his head was pounding. he just opted for rolling over on his bed and staring up to the ceiling as involuntary tears slipped down his temples.

_josh ruined him._


	20. .you waste all this time trying to get to me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUYS ARE U KIDDIN ME
> 
> THIS IS ALMOST AT 1K
> 
> ONE THOUSAND
> 
> WHAT
> 
> thank you!! it means a ton that you're taking your time to read this, tho i'm aWFUL with updating. i'm trying my best, though! i have this weekend to write and post! i'm thinking the story might end soon, maybe about one or two more chapters before the epilogue? it depends, i'll keep writing and see where it goes. but after this,
> 
> ON TO MORE FICS
> 
> i have some ideas in mind that i'll get started on as soon as this is done, but in the meantime, if you could tell me what you would want to read, that'd be great! this is about US y'all, so don't be afraid to talk to me! c:
> 
> again, thank you for everything! some people might think that i'm making a big deal out of it, you know, they're just people reading your stories, who cares, but i like writing a lot, and y'all actually make me feel like i'm writing something interesting, which is important! 
> 
> SO THANKS I LOVE U
> 
> enjoy!

 “tyler, why is josh standing outside of your window?” kelly called, her purse in his hands as she looked out the first-floor window at the kid.

she had looked nice, tyler assuming she was going to dinner with someone when she passed by his door. he only shrugged in an answer, though she couldn’t see him, continuing to scroll through his phone.

“tell him to go home.” he called back, his voice monotoned.

“i’ll tell him on the way out. laura and i are going out, i’ll bring you back some food, okay?”

tyler nodded. “thank you.”

he set his phone down, looking up at the sky through his window. it was drizzling, the sky a grey mess and as angry thunder boomed throughout the clouds. he sighed, hearing his mother leave the house, the door shutting. he listened for her voice outside of his window, hearing her tell josh to go home. he said that he would, but just not right now. after several attempts to get him inside, saying that he’d get sick, kelly eventually gave up and got into her car. tyler shut his eyes, sighing and deciding to do laundry today. he retrieved his hamper from the bedroom and emptied it on the middle of his floor, beginning to separate them.

that was when he heard taps on his window, startling him.

he looked to the floor, really not wanting to have to deal with this. last night was enough for him; if anything, it was almost too much. now he had josh throwing rocks at his window?

tyler trudged over to it, opening his blinds and peeking out at josh. his t-shirt was clinging to his chest, his hair flattened down to his head.

“tyler! i’m sorry! please?” he called up to the window, squinting in the rainwater.

it was getting in his eyes and mouth, but he still stared up at tyler’s window, trying anything to get him to forgive him. tyler stared down at josh, his eyes pained as he chewed on his bottom lip.

“tyler, please! i fucked up so bad, i know that. please just forgive me. even if you don’t want to see me anymore, please!”

tyler sighed, shutting his blinds and getting back to his laundry, the rain growing stronger. josh only sighed, sitting down in his spot, the wet grass sloshing underneath his butt and soaking his underwear. he was getting cold now, and he saw lightning in the distance, but he still sat down and tried to think of a way to apologize better. he could barely see two feet in front of him now, and the rain was beginning to sting, but he stayed, shivering in this awful weather.

he deserved this.

tyler knew he was out there, too, and guilt kept biting at him, trying to drag him outside and tell josh to get in and make him hot chocolate. that’s what you would do for your boyfriend, or any friend, really. so tyler decided to keep his doors and windows closed, shutting josh out as he carried his dark load to the laundry room. his pressed his lips in a tight line, emptying the clothes into the washer and tossing a little detergent packet in there, going back up to his room with the empty hamper. he sat on his bed, scrolling past the fifty text messages that he hadn’t opened from josh, collected from over a week ago.

the thunder was beginning to get harder, his house feeling like it shook from it. it was loud, and it kind of scared him, and he felt even worse the more he thought about josh being out there. he hadn’t heard him in quite a while, and he really hoped he just gave up and went home, that way he wouldn’t have to worry about him anymore.

he went over to his window, barely able to see past the wall of grey rainwater crashing down from the sky. he saw a dark blur, sitting on the flooded grass, and he could see that josh had been crying. a permanent frown was on his face as he thought, staring into the grass. if anything, it just made tyler feel worse, yet he didn’t allow himself to give in.

josh was an asshole, and he wasn’t about to get used for a second time.

he was about to shut the blinds, but josh caught him at the last second, standing up quickly.

“tyler!” he called to the window.

tyler went to his desk, getting a piece of notebook paper out of his drawer and turning it landscape, uncapping a big sharpie and scrawling on it. he heard josh still trying to apologize, and frankly, tyler just didn’t care about it anymore. he was numb; feeling terrible for a week was kind of boring, and he wanted it to be over with. his chest was still hurting, and he still had tears pooling at his waterline, but he just wanted josh to go.

maybe it was because he didn’t want to be responsible for him getting sick, or maybe it was because he didn’t want another reminder of what happened, and what they had before that. he just wanted josh to go.

he fully opened his blinds, pressing the sheet of paper to the window and watched as josh tried his best to read it through the rain. he sighed, josh shaking his head. tyler groaned, opening his window in annoyance and staring down at josh the rain just barely missing his window thanks to how the roof was shaped.

“tyler, please! i’m sorry!” josh called.

“i already told you, i didn’t care.” tyler said, his words feeling like poison.

“what do you want me to do?” josh asked. “i’ll do anything.”

“go away.”

josh blinked at tyler. he knew that josh wouldn’t give up that easy, and by now tyler was convinced that josh actually was sorry. josh sighed, slowly getting down on his knees, embarrassed, yet, this was the only thing he could think of.

“i’m begging you. i need you, tyler. i fucked up, but i can’t lose you. you know i can’t.” **(bLEH)**

“josh, i can’t forgive you. people are talking about me now, just because of what you told your friends.”

“i’ll handle it. i’ll-i’ll spread rumours about myself, to drown them out, i-i don’t know.” josh tugged at his hair, rambling. “i’ll do anything, please?”

tyler was beginning to feel bad again. this probably wouldn’t be a big deal to anyone else, but to have someone who you really liked, and still do, to be out in the rain, literally on their knees and begging you to forgive them – that was a pretty big deal.

“josh, just please go home. i forgive you, okay?” tyler finally said, josh obviously shivering in the cold rain at this point.

tyler had a lump in his throat again.

“you don’t m-mean it.”

“i said i forgive you.” tyler had his eyebrows together, because he didn’t know if he meant it, either.

he was probably saying it just for josh to leave, he didn’t know. it seems like he did thinks without knowing it a lot these days. he watched as josh got up slowly, wiping his nose and sniffling.

“okay.” josh nodded, looking at his house. “okay.” 

he walked slowly over his house, tyler shutting the window and sitting down on the floor, crying out that lump that he managed to hide into his hands. he really did hate josh. he made him cry too much, and he made him feel like he needed to make sure he was okay. that stunt that he just pulled? that was torture, seeing him out in the rain like that. he wasn’t supposed to care; josh was the reason why they weren’t together anymore, all because of his friends, but he couldn’t find it within himself to just leave him out there. he was relieved, to say the least, when josh finally agreed to go back home and get out of this weather. if they were still dating, tyler would have invited him inside, make him tea or something.

he was hurting.

after all this time, just one visit from josh ruined his entire day.

tyler looked up, taking a deep breath, feeling like his lungs were going to explode. he remembered to put his clothes in the dryer. he filled his hamper again with his medium load, replacing the wet ones in the washer and putting them in the dryer. his stomach was growling, forgetting to eat today.

in fact, he didn’t feel like it; his stomach felt like it was filled with stones.

he was about to put his jeans in the dryer, feeling something in the back pocket of it. he made a face, trying to remember what that was, until he thought back to the day when he was at brendon’s house. something was telling him not to open it, that it would just bring back bad memories and make him even sadder, yet his curiosity got the better of him. he took out the damp note from the back pocket of his jeans, putting them in the dryer and slowly unfolding it. his heart beat in anticipation, really trying to find a reason not to open it. there were many, but he was stubborn and almost never listened to himself.

the only thing is, he really wished he listened this one time.

_i think i’m in love with you, baby boy._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> should i put some unnecessary smut in here
> 
> i feel like i couldddddd if i wanted to but tbh it would just be something extra, i don't know.
> 
> anyways, thanks for reading!
> 
> -love, mandi


	21. .megaphones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alrighty, this might be the last chapter! i think i'll add one or two more, and then maybe an epilogue to find of finish it out instead of having it abruptly end right here, but if that is the case...
> 
> I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOYED THIS!
> 
> if you did, let me know. if you didn't, also let me know. your opinions matter to me! if there was something that i wrote that you didn't like or thought was kind of weird to put in here, tell me so i could fix my future writing! don't be scared to talk to me, kids. 
> 
> thank you for reading all the way through! i know it was kind of annoying, but we're almost finished guys
> 
> enjoy! c:

“you said what?” brendon asked, turning completely towards tyler.

“i said i forgave him.” tyler shrugged, looking at his textbooks in his locker.

“why?”

“because i think he’s actually sorry. he was there for almost two hours while it poured.”

“tyler, what if it’s another joke?”

“you think he’d do that if it was a joke?”

“he did _that.”_ brendon said, tyler knowing what he was referring to.

tyler sighed, his gaze never leaving the books. he didn’t know what he was feeling, but he kind of felt better knowing that josh might’ve really meant it. he looked like he did, and tyler was able to read people alright. he shoved his books in his locker, trying not to get trampled by people trying to make it to their friends and lunch in time. he put everything away, his backpack becoming lighter. they made their way to the lunch room, and as soon as tyler opened the door, he heard someone speaking through a megaphone in the corner. he looked to see who it was, josh’s not blonde hair the only thing he could see past the crowd.

“excuse me, can i get everyone’s attention?” josh asked, his voice amped and making everyone literally stop in their tracks.

except for tyler and brendon who began to weave through the crowd towards their table.

josh set the megaphone down and began to talk. he really was extra. tyler didn’t know what was going on, frankly because josh wasn’t one to talk in front of a big crowd like this, but whatever it was must have been important.

“i n-need to tell you guys something very important. i uh...i dated someone for a few months,” tyler stopped, his lungs deflating and his ears growing hot, staring at the floor, “and i really liked them. they were everything to me, yet i still managed to fuck it up in less than a day.”

josh looked at tyler, but then kept going, tyler hearing murmurs of people wondering what the heck this guy was even talking about.

“i...i ended up pretending that i didn’t know them, just to impress my friends. that was the wrong thing to do, and i really shouldn’t have done it. i threw away someone that i r-really liked just for some friends. rumors started going around, that they were stalking me and obsessed with me. if anything,” josh sighed, “...if anything i was obsessed with him. always wanted to see him no matter what time of the day it was.”

“josh, what the fuck?” riley whisper-shouted, making josh shake his head slightly and continue.

“tyler joseph, can you look at me, please?” josh said, tyler’s cheeks on _fire_ as he looked over at josh, feeling stares and judgement beating down on him, but he still kept on looking. “i’m sorry. you see? i’m saying it, in front of all these people, to show you i mean it. i messed up really bad, and it kept eating at me because i love you, ty. i need to hear your voice more often, a-and i haven’t seen a smile in quite some time.”

tyler rolled his eyes in embarrassment, hearing people coo at him, hiding his red face in his hands.

“dude, i take back what i said.” brendon whispered in tyler’s ear.

maybe josh did have bigger guts than he thought.

“did you hear me? i don’t care about what my friends think, i don’t care if i get made fun of or bullied. i said that i love you, and i’ll do anything for you to forgive me.”

tyler sighed, his face still in his hands, josh beginning to get insecure the more the cafeteria was silent. he stepped down from the table, waiting. he expected tyler to leave the cafeteria, and for all of this to be in vain. he even expected another punch to the face for putting him out like that again. he looked to brendon, then to patrick.

“take him back!” patrick shouted, a smile on his face.

“yeah, take him back!” another random kid called from the back of the cafeteria.

 and under the chants of the cafeteria and gazes from the entire room, tyler felt his hands being taken away from his face, looking up at josh. this was so dramatic, but yet, tyler appreciated it.

he decided to change his mind; he meant it this time.

“i forgive you.” tyler said softly, looking at the floor.

“do you mean it this time?” josh asked.

tyler only took josh’s collar in his hands, bringing him down and kissing him hard. josh smiled into the kiss, holding tyler’s waist close to him and pouring every feeling he had into it. all the hurt, the regret, the love, the longing, _everything,_ was being put into the way their lips moved against each other, and tyler could feel it. he could feel everything going away, and he could feel that he was there. he had taken that one step to fall off of that cliff, and frankly, he didn’t mind it. he didn’t mind falling endlessly, waiting to hit the waves below, because that meant he’d be falling with josh.

tyler pulled back, holding josh’s face in his hands, almost forgetting how it felt to be this close to him and not being upset with him. he pressed his forehead to his, looking into his bright eyes.

“i mean it this time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> update: this wAS the last chapter. thank you for your comments and for helping me out!
> 
> i'll see you guys in another fic, but in the meantime just know that i appreciate you guys a lot, a lot c:
> 
> thank you again for everything! 
> 
> -love, mandi

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! i'm gonna post a few more chapters before i start to write, but right now i have the end planned out, so i'll keep writing and try to update regularly. 
> 
> thank you!
> 
> -love, mandi


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